A new year!

How exciting! A new year is almost upon us. i always like the new year because it feels like a fresh start (although i'm well aware that lots of 'junk' is brought from one to the next). i like fresh starts...do overs...refreshes, etc.

i don't have any New Year's Resolutions just yet. Will post them when i do!


HAPPY NEW YEAR! May 2010 be a good one for us all!

Amost a week

At 2am on Tuesday it will be one week since someone thought they would help themselves to the contents of my house, or even me. To say it's been an easy week would be a gross understatement. Quite the contrary, it's been very difficult but i'm trying to work through all the feelings of fear and let my life get back to where it was.

Some baby steps forward: For the past two nights, i've slept at home in my own bed. Of course, i've not fallen alseep until after 3am but still...in my own bed. Previous to that i slept on the couch and then a couple nights at my folks' house 'for the Christmas celebrations' (as i liked to call it...it was, rather, me just being scared).

Tonight, i am going to try to sleep in my own bed, well before 3am and with the bathroom light off instead of on. Another baby step forward.

my house has been made more secure but the feelings of fear keep gripping my heart and it's quite horrible, i assure you. Perhaps if this was the first time something like this happened to me, i'd be a bit faster on the recovery side. Howerver it's the fourth. Car stolen twice and now house broken into twice.

And then of course i wonder why me? i've known lots of folks who go their entire life without either of those two incidents every happening to them. So why do i have to go through this experience? i know that most experiences in life can make you stronger and if you take the time to learn from them, wiser. i try to live that way.

Except this time i just don't understand why my card keeps getting called...and maybe i'm never to know why but i assure you it brings all kinds of emotional crud to the surface and makes me feel ever worse about the person i must be that all this stuff keeps happening to me.

Not fun.

Night the First

Last night was quiet. i slept on the living room sofa with a legal weapon, a phone and my car keys, two cats, three blankets and pillows that kept falling to the floor.

i actually did sleep but was wide awake at 2am...tense...listening. Thankfully all was quiet and still. Twice before that i rose to check out of the windows, concerned that i had heard some kind of noise, but it turned out to be my nerves more than anything.

i think that is the worst thing..trying to get to sleep and feel safe at night. It will come back, because i want it to and will work on such feelings, but it's going to take some time.

Yesterday i had so much anger and i really struggled with that because after all, we are in the Christmas season and my thoughts need to be more about others and about the real reason for Christmas than on the fact that i want to hit someone with a baseball bat. Emotions that are totally on opposite ends of the spectrum. Yet i am finding that today, those emotions are leveling out a bit. i don't feel 'on the edge' today. That, in itself, is a gift.

So little by little, one step at a time, i'll get back to normal and safe. Today, i'm going to do more Christmas shopping with my sister and that will help tremendously, i believe.

Alive. Grateful.

i had a great evening last night. Nothing special but i seemed to get alot done. And then had time to watch for the 2nd time Julie & Julia and while watching got a great idea to maybe cook for a young couple i know like twice a month or so. Not going to blog about it but the movie made me think about how much i love to cook and how i could share that with more people.

Then got ready for bed and was fast asleep until....


2am. Back door alarm is screaming. i woke in a panic thinking it was the fire alarm. Ran downstairs to shut off the alarm and after doing so realized that someone had broken into my house.

This happened one other time a couple of years ago. Instead of panic, now i felt rage. Deep unyeilding rage. Why me? Why again? Who were these jerks to mess up my life? All of that raced through my head as i started to run toward the back door screaming at the top of my lungs..."WHO'S IN MY HOUSE???? GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!! GET OUT! GET OUT! IF I CATCH YOU I'M GOING TO KILL YOU! GET OUT OF MY HOOOUUUSSEEE!"

Not one of my more refined moments.

Some time later, after six policemen, three neighbors and my Father all went through my house, i finally felt a bit more relaxed.

i'm still mad though. First of all because i know it's going to take me quite some time to work through this and feel safe and also to be able to sleep well in my house. Secondly because these thugs feel that they can just waltz into your house and take what they want. i SO wish the police had found them. Thirdly, i'm angry. Not a victim. Not violated. Angry. i want revenge. "They" ruined a perfectly good sleep after a wonderful evening and tried to harm me and/or my house. They were in my house. i smelled the cigarette smoke on their clothing...it lingered in my kitchen. That's MY kitchen. How dare they?

And other emotions - some of graditude: the police were amazing, kind and fast. my neighbors are the best in the world. my Father came without even batting an eye. i was not harmed. Nothing was taken. i found the cats (two cats...both scared but alive and still inside). Nothing was really damaged either. The alarm did what it was supposed to do. i didn't actually kill anyone (even though i screamed that).

And a peace. Peace knowing that i'm God's child and my house was 'given' to Him when i moved in. Whatever He allows to happen is within His control and will and i know it's easy to say because i'm not hurt, but this tests my faith a bit and makes me come face to face with my trust in God.

It also makes me come face to face with the reality that i will be arming myself in the very near future because i will not be molested, harmed or robbed again in my own home.

Also that i'm so very grateful to be alive.

Please Use Your Words

Ok...pet peeve time.

i hate when people say "Have a good one..." What is that supposed to mean? Have a good what? A good car crash? A good heart attack? A good day? A good meal? A good time filling up your car with gas? i mean, seriously, what are they trying to say? Am i to believe that it's easier to say "Have a good one" rather than "Have a good day'??? Same amount of words and energy used to say those words..so ....

i just don't understand it.

The other thing i hate is when people say "yuh-huh" or "nuh-uh" Hate it. My little brother does that all the time and i could seriously put him in a sleeper hold when he does. Drives me nuts. i'm always telling him to 'Use Words'...don't just grunt at me...use words that have meaning. Use words to tell me you disagree or agree...not just sounds that make you appear to be a baby walrus. Words.

ok...rant over. Just be forwarned....should you say 'Have a good one..." or grunt at me instead of using words, my head just might explode all over the place.

Just saying...

All in a day's work

So much has happened in the last month or so that i've felt like i've been stuck in a whirlwind. And all leading up to the Christmas season which i love.

What i've been doing:

1. Helped a family member escape an abusive and unhealthy situation.

2. Had swine flu: The intestinal version. Oh joy. The good part is that i lived to tell the story. The bad part is that i thought i was going home to Jesus at one point.

3. Work has been so busy - not only because of being gone for two weeks but because of the nature of the job

4. Undecorated for Fall/Thanksgiving

5. Decorating for Christmas

6. Watching my beloved Eagles fall apart and play like blech

7. Mourning everytime i see Brian Dawkins in an orange jersey. Double blech

8. This list is not in chronological order..

9. Living life

10. NOT doing a project that i really need to do.

Also...in my planning, i've been slowly changing the way i eat to include more whole and slow food and less fast and furious foods...meaning, i'm doing more natural food choices. However, with the onset of that horrible flu - it's amazing how fast i switched over to this new way of eating. Amazing how my mind set has changed....

This past summer i made about 9 varieties of jam. All the fruits were hand picked by me (and my little brother - who is small and can climb behind the blueberry bushes..he's a champion fruit picker!) and typically became jam no more than 24 hours after leaving the vine/bush/plant/tree. Talk about amazing taste. In most cases, i picked the fruit and it was jam in about 2 hours. The only thing i wish i could've done differently is that the bushes/plants/trees/vines were my own....that part is still in the dream stage.

i've also made inquires about eating more local produce and meat. i am blessed to live in a part of Pennsylvania that is extremely agricultural, both my county and the one just southwest of me. This makes for very good choices that sometimes can be purchased on the farms themselves. The taste difference is something i'm not willing to give up any time soon. There are a number of co-ops around here as well as locally butchered meats (one of the local grocery stores smokes their own meats that are purchased from local farms....they do the smoking right on the grocery store premises). Again, taste, quality and knowing what the animals are being fed make it easy to make choices that are better for me.

Never a dull moment ..that's for sure!

All bottled up

Recently, i've been writing in my paper journal more than i've done anything online. i'm not sure why, when i have about 50 posts just waiting to grace the internet - but they seem bottled up inside..not quite willing to shout my thougts to the world. Maybe i'm in a quiet part of my life, who knows. i'm not destressed by it but would like to get some of this stuff out of my brain/heart so i can fill it up with other good things!

So much to say, so little time...

There are multiple posts floating around in my brain but i've not had a minute to sit down and compose anything worth reading.

First on the list, the Phillies are again in the World Series. If you are not a Phillies baseball fan you have NO idea the absolute joy this brings. It's fun. It's nerve wracking. It makes me want to throw up, with a smile. Yeah. Odd. However, to put it into perspective, my Father, a long-time Phillies fan told me the other day that listening to some of the great baseball calls of the play offs prior to the Series caused tears to stream down his face. Being a fan of Philadelphia sports isn't just a fad or a 'fun' event...it's really deep and personal. The Phillies get this and understand that the fans dont just watch and cheer, they understand the game and analyze it and talk about it around the supper table and teach their children from babies on how to understand and cheer for the Phillies. So that starts tonight and i can hardly concentrate on anything today.

Second on the list would be how i'm changing so much of my thinking about food and what i eat and how i eat it and i purchase and from which place and so on. And my desire to grow my own and be more self sufficient and so forth. That is an entire post on it's own.

Third is how amazingly proud i am of my sister. She is a freshman in college and is in Army ROTC and will be sworn in through National Guard this year and then on to Army ROTC next year and eventually, should she keep on that path, will graduate from college as an Officer. She realizes after this summer (when she completes Basic Training) that she will be eligible for deployment- and all that the decision to go forward means. She understands the risks to her very life and yet she is still incredibly excited about doing this and enjoys it. There are no words to express how proud i am of her...how proud my family is (and a bit scared too...we know...we know). When she was home for Fall Break, she brought her uniform and put it on for us...she showed my 93 yr old Grandfather, who served in the Navy in WWII and then worked as a civilian for the Philadelphia Naval Yard for many, many years....and he saluted her. Patriotism runs deep in my family...and now even more so. She is my baby sister...

And there are more things to talk about..as writing sometimes becomes my therapy and i can express my heart better with the written word than the spoken.

Until later....

Not again!

Last night, I had to do a road trip - a quick five hour affair...got home at 2.30am. It was awesome because i truly love road trips.

What i don't love, however, is when i 'see' things that then happen.

For instance, we stopped at a rest stop early in the trip (because we left so so late) and i waited in the car. While i was waiting, a young, very good looking man went into the restaurant. i noticed him primarily because it was about 9.30pm and yet he was dressed as if he had come from a business meeting and was very neat and tidy and did i mention handsome? He held the door open for an older woman and then proceeded into the restaurat. i noticed when he came out he had a small bag of something and a coffee...and for some reason, i NEEDED to see which car he got into. i didn't realize the 'why' of this but i had that compeling inner tug. i watched him and quietly wished him well. Again, didn't know why i felt like doing that - kinda odd.

When we got back on the road - about five minutes after the young man left - we passed an accident. Car parts everywhere. Glass.. Firetrucks, ambulance and police. It was a mess. Didn't see if anyone was hurt. Didn't want to because it was the car of the young man.

i knew that was going to happen to him. But i didn't realize that i knew it until i saw it.

Not the first time that has happened and it always, always freaks me out. i have learned, though, that when i have an inner drive to wish someone well or take on an interest in that stranger, i pray for them. Asking God to protect them and bless their life.

But it still freaks me out. Everytime.

Like a medicated band-aid

On Saturday, i am going shopping.

i will be shopping for new stockings, heels and probably a new skirt or two....maybe even a handbag, if i can find one i like.

That will make some things that seem out of whack put right back into place.

i mean, seriously, what ravaged soul can't be cured with a pair of stilettos?

Moving on

i'm suffocating here...i have to get out.

i was going to wait...but i can't.

God always makes a way when there seems like the road is blocked....i kinda need Him to make a way today...seriously.

Never Ending

This has been the summer of jam...

strawberry, cherry, raspberry, black raspberry, blueberry, blackberry, peach....

i was looking forward to making peach jam - because that was going to be the end of the jam making season for me - i had all the jars used up and everything was planned just right.

Until one of my neighbors asked me to make Apple Jelly for her
and another one wondered if i'd try Apple Butter and hey! how about Pumpkin Butter but do you think it'll work with butternut squash? And let's try - but oh! i don't know how to do any of that canning stuff so hey, can you do it?

i'm so weak.

i said 'Yes'


i guess jam/jelly season isn't quite over......

Getting so close

i'm so close to just walking away from it all....finding a new direction for my life.

i scare myself when i get like this - because i did that once and was out of work for about four months....some of the best months of my life but kinda freaky when money started to run thin.

i just want more from life....

i found it!

Yesterday i was nosing around looking for a nice country/farm house/land, etc to purchase - to fulfill a dream of mine.

And i found the perfect house...i do mean the perfect house in France.

It was so perfect that it made me feel a little ill. It would be enough room to fulfill my dream and already had established gardens and the like.

Too bad i don't have the $700,000 to purchase it....

Go get him, already.

i've been refusing to get in touch with the news lately - mostly because i realize that almost everything i hear/read makes me incredibly angry.

So it's been nice for my blood pressure and attitude to stay away.

Until this morning....

...when i read/saw a bit about the GI whom the Taliban captured and is using as a pawn.

Angry isn't quite the word i'd use. Furious? Maybe. Is there something beyond furious?

i know without a shadow of a doubt that most, if not all, military personnel know and worry and might even have a plan for this man. my impatience comes that i want him rescued already...and to make the Taliban know that YOU DON'T CAPTURE AMERICANS WITHOUT RETALIATION. (see? there's the furious+1 showing it's head again).

ok...now i'm going to take a deep breath, pray for all involved and be more thankful than ever for our military.

It was the summer of discontentment

To celebrate Independence Day, i had some extra time off from my job. i spent almost the entire weekend outside, much of it surrounded by gardens, water, and making jam and canning cherries. It was dirty, hot work but at one point in the weekend i realized that i was terribly happy.

And here it is Monday, and i'm back at my job - sitting at my desk, fought the traffic to get here...all freezing cold because the A/C is set so low and i realize, once again, that i so don't like this job. Don't get me wrong - i love the place i work - i love what they do - i love the vision of it..the mission, but i'm unhappy in being inside 8+ hours a day, stuck behind a desk doing things where i have no real talent.

But it pays the bills
But i feel like i'm wasting my life
But
But
But

Hmmm...

It's a sad day in America when the current French President is more of a man than the current American President.

Excuse me, but you've forgotten something...

Dear Mr. Blue Shirt in the WalMart Customer Service,

Just about an hour ago, i had the distinct privledge of seeing, first hand, your temper tantrum. It was a sight to behold. Your brown curls were bouncing all over the place as you demanded to be compensated for your time and effort after you forgot to pick up all of your bags from the check out. Clearly that wasn't your fault. i mean isn't that what they pay the cashier the big bucks to do? Pick up after grown men?

Why yes, yes it is.

You also were incredibly verbose as you 'dressed down' the cashier who had bagged your small items (no comment from me) as you had suggested and then, gasp, let you forget to pick up the small bag. What a nincompoop she was and i could tell that she really enjoyed and deserved you berating her. i bet you really felt like a man then. And you should've.

Oh..and by the way -have you heard the new radio commercials about becoming "That Man?"

Well, buddy...you have become "That Man" and quite frankly, you're a jerk.

Next time you go into the general public, you pompous ass, take your manners with you and don't at all berate, talk rudely or act the fool. You are presumably (by your body build and hairy forearms) a man. Act like one.

'Cause the next time i hear you talking stupid, i'm going to smack you with my purse.

Courage

Today, in Iran, a number..a huge number of people took to the streets to protest the recent vote in that country. They felt, according to what i've been reading, that the vote was rigged and that the current government should be defeated.

i have to admit that i don't know if the defeated candidate would be the best for Iran, perhaps he would be. i do know that the current administration needs to go.

However, this post is not to dispute or determine that subject.

What struck me is the passion of the people. They, according to their own statements, are ready to be beaten, struck down and die for what they believe is the right cause. They have taken to the streets - some have been fired on from the government - some have died already - and they are letting their voice be heard.

Good grief

Today my youngest sister graduates from high school.

i think i'm going to be sick.

It is not possible that she is old enough to go to college in the Fall. Someone must have the wrong records!



*************
ps. i'm listening to the Andrews Sisters station on slacker.com....
Just heard:

Sugar in the morning
Sugar in the evening
Sugar at suppertime
Be my little sugar and love this heart of mine.

And then it goes on...but i realized that i knew the entire song by heart and was singing along (yes, at work..i'm sure it was a treat for all).

How do i know that song? Am i that old? Maybe my Grandfather (lovingly called Pop-Pop) sing it to me? Who knows.

Odd.

Must be the weather

The Weekend.

This past weekend was one of the best i've had in a long time. i got so much done around my house and even with a migraine first thing on Saturday, i was able to enjoy it to the max.


One thing i did on Sunday was to visit the annual local World War II weekend, complete with re-enactors, 'villages' and an air show. Not to mention fair food and funnel cakes! It was a wonderful day.


It was also amazing, as one looked with eyes used to today's technology, how the equipment in the 40's was able to win anything. No seriously. The planes used to transport soldiers were basically flying tin boxes, the planes used for bombing and air fights were so tiny and slow, the tanks were slow and huge, the soldiers well equipped but with fight gear and ammunition that makes you really consider the harm they were in. There was none of this 'lock the enemy in the radar and shoot' business (and i'm not looking down on that) - it was more like 'shoot when you see the whites of their eyes.'


Whenever i'm confronted with past wars (and even the present goings on in the Persian Gulf), i am forever grateful for the Men and women who gave all so that we can be free. Don't get me wrong, it was a fun weekend and not at all gloomy - but the underlying truth is that if those folks wouldn't have laid down their lives to combat the Nazi regime, my very life would be totally different, and more than likely not in a good way.


So once again, i say a quiet and humble "Thank You" to those in the past and present who have served and are serving in our military. It is inadequate but it is totally sincere.

mmmmmmmmm Funnel cake.

Perfect age

Since i was a young teen, i always thought that 'older' men were the most handsome and the ones i tried to be around the most. For example, when i was about 14, i LOVED spending time with my 17 and 18 yr old girlfriends so that i could be around their boyfriends! HA! i wasn't the flirty kind of silly girl - i just liked being around them. i liked to watch how they moved, how they acted and they were usually so much smarter than i was that i was in awe.

When i hit about 17 yrs old, i realized that men don't actually become 'sexy' until they are about 45 yrs old. That age for me has held true to this day. Have you ever noticed it? By 45 yrs old, men are more at home in their own bodies, they usually love what they are doing in life, they have smile lines around their eyes and maybe have a bit of grey in their hair. They are weathered a bit...been around the block and have alot of the awkward corners that boys have are now knocked off. They are still goofy and still little-boy like sometimes, but just are more mature and oh.so.handsome.

Boys that were cute when they were younger now, at 45, become so amazingly handsome that you just want to clock them over the head and drag them into your fireplace.

****************************

Disclaimer: This does not apply to any male in military dress blues. Then, no matter the age, they are just F.I.N.E!

Just saying...

i know exactly when...

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Meet me in St. Louis

Tonight my sister in law, nieces (the sweetest in the world), mother, father and two brothers and i (and that's only about 1/3 of our family) will be having a movie night. We're staying up 'late' (that makes the 5 yr old giggle) to watch "Meet Me In St. Louis" Sprawling out in the family room, snuggling and just spending time together - sounds like the perfect way to celebrate an early Memorial Day.

And we'll be doing so in total freedom.

Happy Memorial Day and for those who served, Thank you.

How can this be?

It's 2am and the rest of the house is quiet and sleeping...and my sister and i have been playing online arcade like games. It's been a blast -just spending time with her and realizing once again, just how poorly i play arcade games. But even in defeat - and espeically in victory - there was fun to be had just being together.

i'm terribly proud of my sisters...but this one has just finished high school and will be graduating soon and going to college. She's had to face alot of obstacles in her young life -and yet i feel that she will succeed and do so spendily. We are close - and i know i'll cry when she moves away, but my heart swells with pride and love to see her making some good choices and trying to acheive her dreams.

So now that our eyes are almost swollen shut and our hands hurt from playing ..i'm gonna hit the hay.

Good night sweet sister. i love you more than you'll ever know and am so thankful that long ago, God saw fit to make you part of the family. i cannot imagine life without you.

Guess what?

i just decided that sometime in the next 10 years, i want to be published.

So...i guess i'd better learn how to write, eh?

A-CHOOOOOOOO

i gotta tell you - i'm SO over the sniffling, sneezing, sneezing, not sleeping because i can't breathe part of Spring. Though i LOVE Spring and am so glad it's finally warm and that i can be outside planting and working in the lawn and garden, this breathing through one nostril is getting kinda old.

Don't get me wrong, i'm very glad to be breathing at all -it's awesome, but i'll be glad when the pollen count in the air goes from so high that everything has a green sheen to more tolerable.

A co-worker told me to get one of those nose pot cleaner outer thing, but the very idea of pouring water into my nose from a tea-pot looking devise is not only gross, but also kinda disturbing.

And now?

Coffee.

Whew i made it to Monday

What a weekend. Friday was graduation and it was a hectic day (as well as the few days proceeding it). However, the President of the College was very happy with the results so that makes me happy (and exhausted)

Saturday saw me finishing a 700 page book and lying like a slug all around the house. Awesome time.

Sunday was church and family time.

Monday is i'm exhausted from it all time and going to bed at 8pm.

i think this officially makes me an old person.

Ya know....

i was having a really good day - enjoying the sun (YAY!), plugging along at work, getting things done, enjoying life. i was in a really good mood. Ate well..good wholesome food, drank some freezing cold water (which is the way i enjoy it most) even got to chomp on some ice!

And then....

And then i read this article: http://www.google.com/hostednews/ap/article/ALeqM5gQE_N0r1XomQlXbpcUFNoe9e6fWgD984NMN80

and i'm SO STEAMING MAD i dont know what to do with myself.

In fact, i'm so mad, i can barely get full sentences out and probably haven't.

i'm furious.

And if you have any sense, you will be too...not just 'ohh poor them..' or some stupid mamby-pamby line...furious.

And i'll tell you another thing - i'd better not, for one second, take my life, my freedom for granted. Too many other women pay such a higher price - because they are female - and and...see? can't even finish the sentence...that's how mad...how furious and how broken hearted i am!

Can't believe it's Monday

This not-working-two-jobs-thing might become habit forming. i had one of the best weekends i've had in a long time (cruise not counting). Just to be able to clean my house, work in my lawn/garden (complete with sneezing and sneezing and sneezing...oh the joy of pollen) and spend some good time with family and friends..attend a concert and celebrate Mother's day with my Ma was very, very nice.

And even though it's already Monday and i'm back to my grumpy-don't-get-in-my-way self, still the pleasantness of the weekend might even carry me through the day.

That and about four cups of coffee.

It's the most wonderful time of the year

SNEEZE!

The pollen is wonderfully high and mighty today. Though i don't usually have a problem with it, today is the exception and i feel like a constant sneezer. Pulling weeds- sneeze. Cleaning my house-sneeze. Over at my folks' for supper-sneeze.

Isn't it fun?

i love this time of the year!

How do i love thee? Let me count the ways

i'm not really into the whole self-love thing..though i do want to take care of myself, but i am starting to take small steps to gaining back my life.

1. Took a leave of absence from the 2nd job. i don't want to quit it all together - i mean in this economy having any sort of job is a wonderful thing, but i need the break. So the LOA is at least until the end of May - maybe longer. Would you believe me if said i felt better already? Sleeping through the night, waking early...this could be a wonderful rest of the month.

2. Am going to take a HUGE look at my general health and weight. One thing that was alarming was some weight gain in the past few months. What the heck is that all about? So as soon as my knee heals completely will be hitting the gym hard, until then will be doing better with eating and taking care of what is put into my body. i'm rather excited about this.

And i'm still way open to marrying for money - i CAN be the trophy wife you've always wanted.

:wink:

Don't want to live like this anymore

Currently, i work two jobs. One full-time job that is about 45 min commute each way and one, a part-time job that is about 5 min commute each way.

And ya know what? i'm tired of working so much. i have no time to myself, no time to just do things and enjoy life. It's crazy.

The thing is, the money from the part-time job really helps with fuel in the winter and if i were disciplined enough, i could save all summer and it would be easy street for fuel.

However, the flip side is that my life is passing before me and i'm not running it...it's running me. i don't want to live like this. i want to embrace life, enjoying as many moments as possible. i want to take time to just sit and enjoy nature, to invest in me a bit more, to be with family and friends more, to try something new and unusual.

So i guess i have a few options

One option is to marry a rich Man (i like this option)
Another is to just be really frugal and still save for the winter months
A third is to run away from home
A fourth option is.........(feel free to give suggestions).

The Bahamas

Well..turning 30(again) was easier than i thought (KURT! I AM NOT 50!). i mean when you're surrounded by white beaches, blue sky, clear wonderful water and cabana boys...how tough can it be?

Not tough at all.

So here's to being 20!

Feels like my life has just begun.

Leaving on a Jet Plane

Tomorrow i'll be flying to a warm location.

Friday i'll board a ship that will take me to an even warmer location.

Friday is also my birthday. A BIG one. i was rather depressed about it - i just can't believe i'm that old.

However, the cruise to the warm islands will probably help with that depression.

Be back later

Sad day for Philadelphia Sports Fans

Our beloved Harry Kalas, sports commentator for the Phillies, died today at the age of 73. When i was 12 or so, i really became interested in baseball and used to listen and fall asleep to all of the Phillies games. Harry's voice became the soothing one of commentary and i learned alot by just listening to the games on the crackly AM radio station. Last season, he called the best games ever - especially when we went to the World Series and won it. He was in the Parade, i saw him and screamed (yeah, like a crazy person).

He will be missed - His commentary, his love for the Phillies and the fans, his knowledge of baseball...

Thank you, Harry Kalas, for all those wonderful years of commentating and for teaching me about the beautiful game of baseball. May you rest in peace.

Taking care of pirates

As i write, the Somali pirates who 'captured' the American-manned ship still hold the Captain as a captive.

i have the perfect solution. Four Navy Seals...one for each terrorist...four bullets. They can scale the lifeboat, do their thing and rescue the Captain, return him to the ship and slip back into the water...all in about three minutes.

i wonder if i should email my idea to the Navy?
hmmm....

Queen of France

Don't ask how, it's a long story, but i have a nickname-given to me by some of my friends and family- as the Queen of France.

Today, the QOF needed cake at 9.30 am.

So the QOF went to the store and got some cake, made a fresh pot of coffee and is now sitting peacefully at her desk doing her work...very happy and licking the icing from her dainty fingers.

Keeping the QOF happy is a very important job.

Trust me on this.

Wake up and smell the coffee...

The mistakes and gaffes and stealing and lying and cheating that is going on in this country's government right now is about to make my head explode. The arrogance and disregard for the Constitution and all the good that this country stands for is enough to make me go postal.



Seriously.



If the American people don't wake up and see what's happening to our very freedoms and start speaking out about it, we're going to go down a road that will take forever to undo.

Whew! Dodged that bullet!

In today's headlines, the President of Brazil apparently said that the global credit crisis has been caused by 'white people with blue eyes.'

Since my eyes are brown, i'm not to blame.

YEEE HAWWW and give me more credit!

Ahh! It's Spring!

The Spring Cleaning bug has bitten me pretty hard in the past week (dang bug!) - and i can't wait to get home tonight to see what else i can throw out or donate to charity. Can't. wait. Why?
Cause it's just so much fun to declutter and get rid of junk! love it!

i'm tackling one of my worst places in the entire house: the basement. i have stuff down there that just needs to find another home. Like roller blades with no innards...the wheels are great - still works but long ago a nice little mouse made it's home out of the innards and so...

Think someone would buy them for $.50?

Oh, that reminds me - i want to rent a table at the local flea market to get rid of my stuff. Everything will be under a dollar...closer to $.25 and $.50. Though the money would be great - i want to de-clutter more.

SO! Here's to phase one of Flea Market Fun!

Slip, Slip, Slipping Away

Freedom.

We knew you when.

Now?

Yeah, not so much.
http://www.foxnews.com/politics/first100days/2009/03/23/fusion-centers-expand-criteria-identify-militia-members/

How Tactless!

So apparently Mr. Obama made a wise-crack comparing his bowling ability to Special Olympics. While this isn't something that will put the world up in arms, it was tactless of the Leader of this Country to say on National Television.

i have two brothers who have a very real and life-long disabilty. One of them is confined to a wheelchair most of the day and though he can use his arms, it takes considerable effort to do so. The other brother can walk with crutches or a walker, but also uses a wheelchair.

And while neither boy is overly sensitive about their disability and are rather cool kids (even if i do say so myself), i can't imagine that they were thrilled with that statement. And just because it might not bother them, i am sure that there are others who felt the slight.

Learning proper protocol and ettiquette should be a high priority for whomever takes the highest position of our Land. i dare say the Obamas could use a couple of crash courses...the sooner..the better.

The List

So i've done three more things on my 101 things in 1001 days. That makes me very happy - cause i LOVE to check things off of a list! WHOOT!

Completed:

#33 - Go through shoes and either donate or throw out.
This wasn't a very hard thing to do - as the new season is upon us and i like to wear my shoes until they really are ready for the rubbish heap. Plus it gives me a very, very good excuse to get new ones, right? Double WHOOT!

#63 - Buy flowers for myself
i've done this three times in the last two weeks. First it was daffodils, then tulips and now i have a lovely small bouquet of Gerber daisies and roses. i love fresh flowers and they are so worth the money. Plus they bring joy to all who see them. i wonder why i don't do this enough for myself? Crazy.

#91 - Become involved in my political party.
Well...i'm kind of becoming a barracuda in this area. However, i'm finding that i enjoy it and also realize that i have a lot to learn about politics and what is going on in our country's government. As i try to keep this blog as politic-free as possible, let me just say that i'm becoming very passionate about what is the right thing to do, regardless of political party. When our government chooses to do wrong (and both parties have through the years), the ones to pay the ultimate price are her citizens. So those citizens must, for their own safety, speak up when they disagree and let their voice be heard. Remember: the government works for the citizens...not the other way around.

So three things that have been very fulfilling to me to accomplish. Can't wait to tackle more...!

Sleep, Sleep, Wherest Art Thou?

For about the past three weeks, i've not had a decent night's sleep. Either i cannot go to sleep or i wake around 3am. It's horrid. i feel horrid and am sure that dark circles around my eyes are just on the horizon.

i thought at first that i was upset about some family issues, but no, i'm at peace with that.

Then i thought it was the economy and present adminstration, and yes, i'm still upset on a daily basis, but try not to take that to bed with me.

Then i imagined that it was my horrible newish neighbors and perhaps that is part of it - they come and go at all hours of the night and i can hear their door slam, etc.

Sometimes i feel hungry but who wants to cook at 2am?

It's almost become that i dread 'sleep time' and think i should just stay awake for 24 hours to try to re-set my internal clock.

Or maybe i need to knock back a pint or twelve.

Hmm...now there's something to think about!

Are Ya Wearin' the Green?

Happy St. Patrick's Day to one and all.

Kisses to the true Irish.

Pinches to those who forgot to wear the green.

So raise your glasses high, embrace some great Celtic music and dance!

It's a lovely day.




(my grandfather never wishes me a Happy St. Paddy's day as his side of the family were/are Protestant and he actually used to march in the Orangemen's Day Parade!...so whether you're wearing the green or orange - have a tremendous day!)

What a weekend!!

Friday: Only had to work one job. So...decided to spring clean Master bedroom. New comforter set, new curtains, cleaned everything, rearranged furniture, threw out a bunch of things, read some old love letters that my grandmother and grandfather sent to each other - cried a bit at their deep love, took a hot shower and crawled in between fresh wonderful sheets. Slept very deeply.

Saturday: Didn't have to work! WHOOT! Went to a Mary Kay party with my mother, spent some time with one of my sister's, saw a huge flock of robins in a farmer's yard (the first sighting of the season! YAY!), chilled for a bit, did laundry (ok,..because of spring cleaning and washing some curtains, that took until 9pm), somewhere in there i ate, watched an old movie, went to bed...oh and the house was so hot - it was kinda wonderful.

Sunday: Didn't have to work! DOUBLE WHOOT! Went to church an hour late, realized it in the parking lot, went grocery shopping, went back to church for the later service, went home, got the paper, drank coffee and read the paper, put up new curtains in kitchen (and the washed lace ones), made homemade yoghurt for the first time, made two quiches (bacon, asparagus, cheese..YUM!) cut and froze one, cut and froze some strawberries, make artichokes and endulged in them while waiting for the quiches to bake, went outside and sat and talked with the neighbors for a few minutes, ate the quiche, watched an old movie, went to bed and read for a while.

It was a fairly great weekend. i got so much done at home, but also saw how much there is to do here in Spring Cleaning season.

Unfortunately, i have to work a lot this week, but have great plans for next Saturday morning and maybe even Wednesday of this week...

Spring is surely on it's way!!

Ain't it fun?

This morning i attended a famous brand make up party with my mother. When we arrived, the other women were already there and we spent the next few hours cleansing, moisturizing and putting on makeup. It was a blast.



Sometimes, when one attends these types of things, the women are shy and don't say much. However, the hostess made a big mistake by sitting my mother and another good friend next to me and we laughed tremendously.



So here i am...all made up and feeling great and it's only 1.31pm. Time to hit the shops!



It's just so much fun to be a girl....most times!

i'm still upset

Anger, like grieving, has a cycle and mostly will works it way out of me in time. i try not to live my life so that anger takes over at any time. However, this whole thing with the Philadelphia Eagles and Brian Dawkins has me quite upset.

And the more time goes on and the story unfolds, the angrier i get.

You just don't let a guy like him walk away without begging him to re-consider.

But the front office just doesn't get it - and then the lie to top things off. So yeah, great times.

i'm not a jock -though i played sports in highschool- i'm acutally quite girlie and will scream at spiders and mice and other things that are creepy, smaller than i and with lots of legs. i like pink. i love flowers. i garden, read and play the piano. i like lace. i love antiques. i wear skirts and heels and makeup.

But

but when i think of football and the Eagles in particular, a deep passion resides that comes with a very, very strong opinion and a loud voice. it's kinda funny, actually.

Brian Dawkins played with the same passion as the fans cheered. For so many fans of the Eagles, cheering for them has been handed down from generation to generation and that love of the team is deeply instilled in families from birth. It's something i've experienced, yet can't really explain. And Dawk got that and played and loved the game the same way that 'we' did.

And now he's gone. And the Front Office looks like a bunch of schmucks.

i love football but am not excited about the new season....thankfully we have the Flyers and Phillies to root for in the meantime!

How did it happen?

The Philadelphia Eagles are no longer the home team of Brian Dawkins.

Words..mere words cannot express how i feel about this, but i assure you that it's not good.

i just can't believe it.

i think the entire city of Philadelphia is in mourning and needs to be enrolled in a 12-step grieving program.

ugh

Nine more weeks

i have a rather um...monumental birthday coming up and one of my sisters has decided that i need to celebrate in style.

So she booked us on a cruise with six other women to the Bahamas.

i am so excited because: 1) it's my first cruise ever, 2) it's my first time to the Bahamas, 3) i love the sea and being on water, 4) i love celebrations (although this birthday is freaking me out - truly) and 5) another reason to SHOP!

It's all in the coughing

Somehow i've succumbed to the dread sickness of the common cold. It's a lovely little beast that starts with a sore throat, then headaches, then coughing and a few body aches. Not quite the flu, not quite bronchitics..but annoying all the same.

For four days all i did was sleep and cough and whine and take it easy. By last night, i was so sick of my own company, i almost phoned anonymous people just to make conversation. Would've been fun except that i can't say more than 15 words without coughing.

oh joy.

Re-Thinking my outfit

So today's skirt is rather um...form fitting to my body. i thought it was going to look really tacky, but suprisingly, it doesn't. (i've been described as having a 'black girl's butt' from people of colour...on more than one occasion...yeah, J-Lo...take notice!)

Here's to a bubble butt and tight skirt!

WHOOT...Happy Wednesday!

The right shade

i am a very white person. The Irish-German genes, passed to my from my beautiful parents, somehow made my skin very pale, pinkish undertones with freckles. Finding the right make up is a nightmare. If it's too light, i look like a ghost, but if it has any yellow in it, i look like i'm ill.

So i tried Bare Minerals and i do love the system...the only problem is that i picked up (accidentally) the wrong shade of foundation and now look like i have jaundice. i need fair...porclalin...really pale...pink undertones, no yellow in sight.

Jaundice looking aside...or maybe scurvy...[i do wonder how i'd look with scurvy] - i really like the system of layering a powder on your face instead a cream that takes a crow bar and three swarthy men to pry off your face at the end of the day.


{side note: if there were three swarthy men in my house at the end of the day, taking off my makeup would be the LAST thing on my mind! Just saying.}

Because sometimes you need it...

Today, i am going to buy a bunch of tulips for myself.

It will be a nice pick-me-up and bring some Spring Cheer to my house.

Can't wait!

(picture taken from Google images...land of tulips)

Brace Yourself

Today, a very mildish pleasant day in SouthEastern Pennsylvania, has had winds upwards of 40 mph. Driving is a chore as one attempts to keep one's Honda from blowing off of the highway and into a dormant corn field. Walking is quite funny as one's things and clothing is almost blown off one's body, not to mention one's hair...which one (ok. ok me) wonders why one did one's hair in the first place.

The winds, however, aren't the bone chilling ones of last month. There is a hint of mildness to them and almost feel like the winds of March. Kite flying would be optional - but one would want to weigh more than 100 lbs or else the kite and wind would send one up, up and away.

i do believe Spring is on the way. To think that in about 44 more days, winter will be almost behind us? i think i can make it....

Did it!

Number 70 was completed...no computer for the entire weekend (though i was tempted to touch it last night!)

Instead, i cleaned the house, finally took down all my Christmas decorations-including my real tree that hardly shed any needles and still smells quite fresh-and put them away, went to the bookstore and spent a load of money and time there but emerged with some wonderful books, read, took a nap, spent some time outdoors in the sun talking with neighbors and generally having a lovely go of it. It was a very nice, even if very quiet, weekend.

In reading, i finished The Associate and The Gatecrasher and started Animal, Vegetable, Miracle as well as Lost Women of the Bible and a biography of Mother Theresa. So my reading has really been kicked up a notch and i'm loving it.

More on the books later.

101 things in 1001 days update

Time for an update:

Numbers 34, 35 & 36 are done and are actually ongoing - i met my goals but found that i really do that most of the time anyway. As for the red lipstick -i have worn it but it wasn't the absolutely best colour for me, so i'm going to try to get the perfect colour this weekend.

Also a goal for this weekend is #70-which is to go the entire weekend without turning on my computer. Honestly, this will be a hard one for me, but i'm going to try to do it anyway. i've done it in the past and so i know i can survive without the computer!

More updates coming in the near future. i'm glad to be checking things off of this list and excited for some warmer weather to do even more!

Ta-ta for now

***********


Reading
1. Read through the Bible from front to back. (0/66)
2. Read all the books on my classics list (0/142)
3. Read The Economist every month
4. Read something that I totally don’t agree with (either religiously/politically, etc)
5. ReRead the Narnia Series

Writing
6. Write in my blog a minimum of three times a week.
7. Write some essays or edit ones I’ve already written
8. Submit a transcript for a children’s book
9. Write the transcript for a children’s book

Arithmetic
10. Invest in a MacBook
11. Investigate how to do a slow spending year or couple of months
12. Become totally debt free – including mortgage
13. Become more involved in my investments

Health and Wellness
14. Thirty minutes of yoga three times a week for one month. (0/12)
15. Visit the dentist for a real appointment
16. Pamper myself to a spa
17. Begin vitamin/barley green regiment
18. Take a morning walk every weekday for two weeks. (0/14)
19. Eat organicially for two months
20. Do the 21-day “Daniel” fast

Food and Drink
21. Totally re-do pantry
22. Learn to bake good bread
23. Learn to make really good pie crust
24. Eat soup for lunch for one week. (0/7)
25. Learn to forage in the woods edible things – do research before foraging
26. Go a week without soda. (0/7)
27. Make chocolate/lemon cake for sister for no reason other than just because
28. Drink a glass of milk per day for a month. (0/30)
29. Drink only water for one week. (0/7)
30. Eat a hot breakfast everyday for one week. (0/7)
31. Buy organic products and free range meats
32. Check out the co-op in Lancaster

Fashion and Beauty
33. Go through my shoes and donate some to charity or throw out
34. Moisturise feet nightly for two weeks. (14/14) - done
35. Moisturise hands daily for one month. (30/30) - done
36. Wear red lipstick. - done
37. Get my hair cut short (this one scares me)
38. Have a facial.
39. Have a professional makeup consultation.
40. Find an all-purpose dress to keep in my wardrobe.
41. Invest in good lingerie
42. Get a pedicure.
43. Find another skirt style that looks great on me

Crafty, Crafty
44. Learn how to sew
45. Learn how to knit
46. Complete three cross-stitching projects (0/3)
47. Learn about crocheting.
48. Learn how to fix things in my own home

Travel and Tourism
49. Go to Ireland.
50. Go to the Philadelphia Zoo.
51. Go to the Cape May Zoo
52. Return to Paris
53. Go to at least four operas
54. Become a Reading Royals fan
55. Go to a European Christmas market.
56. See tulips in Holland.
57. Visit three states never been to before in the US

Charitable
58. Donate old clothing to Good Will
59. Use all shoe boxes for Operation Christmas

Spiritual
60. Find and use a daily devotional for one year. (0/365)
61. Attend church every Sunday
62. Keep a gratitude journal for one month. (0/30)

Everyday Fun
63. Buy myself flowers from the florist
64. Buy flower boxes for front windows
65. Get a new set of everyday dishes. - done
66. Take a photograph every day for a month. (0/30)
67. Make a “dinner music” playlist.
68. Have a games day/night.
69. Order holiday cards from Etsy.
70. Spend a weekend at home without turning on the computer.
71. Afternoon tea with Person X.
72. Send 10 random “thinking of you” cards. (0/10)
73. Send flowers to someone for no reason.
74. Get an iPod and learn how to use it
75. Compile an iTunes library
76. Update address book.
77. Take a French class.
78. Listen to all songs in my iTunes library.
79. Play in the rain.
80. Have a picnic in the park.
81. Get up at 4am for one week. (0/7)
82. Make a will.
83. Stargaze.
84. Really consider if want to get a Master’s degree
85. Consider changing careers
86. Ask a random guy out for dinner
87. Have at least 10 fancy dinners in my house (0/10)
88. Change my garden
89. Garden veggies at my folks’ house
90. Send random ‘Thank you for investing in my life’ cards or emails
91. Get involved in my political party
92. Find a mentor for whole eating/slow year living
93. Adopt an older person at a nursing home
94. Play the piano as much as possible
95. Go to the movies more – even if alone
96. Find a really good friend
97. Eat at the Afghan restaurant in Philly
98. Eat a small piece of chocolate everyday (exceptions: while on 21-day fast)

And the Formalities
99. Write a blog post for each completed item.
100. Donate $2.00 for each unfinished item to a charity of my choosing.
101. Write a new list for the next 1001 days.

Oh help!

Today i received this in an email from a relative:

On Glen Beck's radio program, and also on Rush's radio program, they played a clip of Nancy Pelosi saying, "without the stimulus bill getting passed immediately, more than 500 million American workers will lose their jobs each month."

Since there are only 300 million people in the USA, that's quite a statement.

The guys on Glen Beck went wild with that, saying that, using Pelosi's figures, even the people on Mars will lose their jobs within a year if the bill doesn't pass.

Isn't there someone in our government with an ounze of intelligence? Good grief!

i feel bad for the people on Mars though.

:snicker:

Wanted: A Garden to Rent

We all know that times are tough - pretty much for everyone. Even those who aren't feeling the pinch are buckling down to prepare in case things get worse. Thus far, i've been ok, but am trying to do whatever i can to lower expenses.

This Spring/Summer i am going to try to rent a garden. i love to garden but my small city backyard, while great for flowers and herbs, isn't really the place for a full blown garden. i've put out a few 'feelers' to see if i can rent one out of the city but kind of close. i would imagine that if someone has a bit of land and doesn't mind a stranger gardening on it, it would be a decent idea to raise a bit of money.

The idea is to be able to raise my own stuff so that i can freeze and can it- thus saving money in the long run. i already have the seeds for most of the veggies i want and only have to get corn, potatoes, tomatoes and peppers. Not a difficult endeavor. i'm also buying only heirloom seeds because the genetically modified hybrid stuff is just scary.

So....here's to finding a plot of ground, or an unused garden that won't cost me an arm and leg but will provide for the winter.

Can't wait to get started!!!

Let it snow..or ice...or whatever

Today is a snow day for me. my primary job is at a college and they closed for the day due to bad weather conditions.

i am not complaining. It's been a wonderful morning thus far.

i lounged in bed reading for a bit.
Then got up and made bacon and french toast and cleaned up the kitchen.

Then took down some Christmas decorations (yes, they are STILL up!) And now i'm mucking about online.

Yet to do:
Some cleaning
A bubble bath
More reading
A nap
A walk outside
Shoveling
More reading
and who knows what else.

Not a bad day, eh?

This thing called love

Sometimes i feel that love is such an overused word. We love everything from tofu to toilet paper and usually people or pets. But what is love?

Love is warm flannel sheets.

Yes, i've crossed over to the love the sheets from the hate the sheets.

The way those sheets embrace my body, warming it, wrapping me in a cocoon of comfort even in freezing temperatures - allowing me a restful sleep.

Waking and being able to stretch and feel that the entire bed is warm, even while the room is not.

This?

This is true love.

i'm gonna divorce you and run away to Australia

Dear Siblings between the ages of 18 and 20, (ok..sisters...)

i love you. Always have. Always will.

However, you are going through phases that are making your eldest sister (that's me!) insane and i am going to divorce you

and run away

to Australia

and live in the out back

with a kangaroo

who will probably be less trouble than the pair of you.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!
***************************

And in other news: the stomach flu that lasts for more than a week should be outlawed.

Just saying.

To keep up...

Well on my 1001 things in 101 days...no wait, it's 101 things in 1001 days or something...well whatever!

Anyway -one of the things was to purchase (#65 on the list) was a new set of everyday dishes. And i found them. They are a bit bigger than i would normally have chosen, but the colours are exactly what i want to redo my kitchen. So ...here they are!

Sometimes you just want a hug

my bad Sunday has morphed into a bad week thus far.

Still feel horrible in the stomach area
and making stupid mistakes all over the place.

Not sure if i just want to put my head down and cry
or throw up.

Insult to Injury

On Sunday, i had a very bad day.

First of all, i woke with an upset stomach but i went to church anyway. Then, in the middle of the service, i had to make a run for the bathroom but alas, nothing but gagging happened. So i sat in the foyer because i really just didn't feel well. Had i been able to get the attention of my sisters (who were sitting close to the back) we would've left, however, that was not to be. Oh no..much more was in store for me.

Then i had one of the 'wanna get away?' moments....yeah. In church. Oh the joy.

So i went to my folks' house to watch the big game (Eagles vs. Arizona) and was all bundled up and lying on the couch.

And the Eagles lost.

And i'm not sure what was worse: throwing up in the ladies bathroom at church or the Eagles loss.

All the way around, it was a crummy day.

blech

Reaching our potential

SO today's high for my part of Pennsylvania was supposed to be 14F. We reached that at 1.29pm. i think that deserves some sort of celebration - preferably with chocolate...and vodka...or both! WHOOT!

In other news: i have a small space heater in my kitchen. It is on the floor. It has an internal thermometer. This morning, it said 45F. Wow.

And still in other news:

Sunday is a very important day...the Eagles play Arizona and if they win (yes, i said 'if' --i am a realistic fan) then it's SUPERBOWLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL.

i'm so excited i can barely sleep - except those darn soft and warm flannel sheets just put me to sleep like a log.

GO EAGLES!!!!!

An Old Maid

So the flannel sheets were purchased, washed, dried and put on the bed last night. They ARE warm - especially since they were still kinda warm from the dryer.

However, the only ones the store had were these pink-ish flowered ones.

i might as well put my hair up in a hair net
to go with the Ben Gay perfume
Prune Juice lunches

and pink flowered flannel sheets.

::sigh::

i am so strange

So...i live in a row home built in my city around 1910. The walls on the outside are brick and the inside is plaster over that brick..kinda thick walls but not insulated. So the outside walls get quite cold in the winter.

To help conserve energy, i don't heat my bedroom. When i go in there to go to bed, you can see your breath. i prefer the cold and pile on tons of quilts and comforters. Diving into bed each night is a bit of a dare, but by morning it's hard to leave my snuggly nest of covers. i sleep so well and deeply, breathing in cool and clear air.

i blame my mother for this behaviour....in a good way.

However, as i'm getting older, i'm finding that diving into cotton sheets is almost more than i can handle. It's like getting flash frozen. So i might invest in flannel sheets - which is a huge thing for me(if you only knew how much i hate flannel sheets).

So, not only am i strange -= i'm now old and dressing in flannel. What's next? BenGay perfume and prune juice for lunch?

:sigh:

Oh and ....

i had a dream last night that was very odd and funny at the same time. One part of it was that i was leaving a country club and going toward my car when a man, shorter than i, kinda bumped into me. He then apologized and started to move away. i glanced back at him, he was getting into his truck, and he yelled from across the parking lot "If i were 5Ft taller, this would be the part where i'd ask you where we were going for dinner."

Something in me (in this dream) said take a chance and i yelled back "Actually, you can take me to the opera tomorrow night."

And as he started walking toward me, with a huge grin on his face........I WOKE UP!

Now sheesh - who knows where that might have gone! And he was cute - although i didn't recognize his face from anyone i know.


And yes, my dreams are always that vivid and usually that crazy.( don't even get me started on the amish girls who carried garlands of flowers which hid machine guns....yes, same dream).

Sometimes, i'm just odd

There are times when something reported in the news really sticks with me and i think about it alot. This particular time was the whole Putin shutting of the gas and wondering if folks are ok in Eastern Europe. i've been to some of the houses in that part of the world, and know, first hand, that in the winter, things can be quite chilly. If fuel for heating is cut off or slowed down, i am sure that there are some who are really uncomfortable and i really feel badly for them. But what can i do, right? i'm so far away and sending any kind of money now won't help them keep warm tonight....

So i lower my own heat and spend time in prayer for them.

i did the same some time ago when i learned that some missionary friends of mine had no electricity from 3pm - 6am every day and they lived in a very cold-in-the-wintertime country. The wife said how by the end of winter, she couldn't stand the thought of lighting one more candle for light and longed to just flick on a switch. i love candlelight and never thought that it would or could become a burden but then, i've never been forced to live only by candle light in the dead of winter. So for one week, after 3pm, i didn't use electricity. However, i also didn't flip off the fridge or the oven or the phone...but i did try to not use lamps or lights or the TV and it was hard.

Maybe it's a way of 'fasting' for me - or..well i just don't know, but i do know that when i feel this kind of burden, trying to at least identify with the folks who are suffering makes me far less likely to take my own comforts for granted.

i know it sounds like "eat your peas cause kids in Africa don't have peas to eat" that moms and dads use to create guilt for their kids, but it's really deeper than that. It's more like, don't waste what you've been given. Give thanks for what you have. Live responsibly and enjoy life and the comforts you find in your life.

Sheltering myself

i rarely watch television. If i have time, i'll pop in a movie but i had the cable taken off years ago. Part of the reason for this is that i'm kinda a news junkie and as one can tell from the two less than attractive posts preceding this one, i get all crazy with bad news. It's mostly an irritation that mankind refuses to take responsibility for their own actions but sometimes it really does bother me, interrupting sleep and keeping me from doing chores and other good things around my home and work. It's like a self-shelter - protecting my inner woman from things that i know will bother me or upset me.

So i've put a little restriction on foxnews.com, cnn.com and bbc.co.uk just for about a week or so. It's not that i don't want to be informed....it's that i'd rather be informed about everything that is happening everywhere and that really isn't a good idea! LOL

It's 6.49am and i'm already at work, being unable to sleep through the night so i decided to come in early and enjoy the quiet. And i find i'm in a much, much better mood, even though the lack of sleep.

Also? i'm wearing the cutest skirt know to mankind. And a gorgeous red scarft.

And now....coffee and a sweet. See? The world may be falling to pieces but i'm going to enjoy this morning anyway!

Something i just love

***Warning: Rant and not very nice post below - feel free to visit when

i'm being nicer***

i just love it when the world, involved in their own problems and bitter rivalries and acting like spoiled children (you think Putin turning off the gas lines wasn't a spoiled-child tantrum? look again) and they blame it all on America.

Nothing makes me happier than to see the world at large not able to stand up for themselves and say, "Hey guess what? We're a mess and we've made a mess and we have to take care of this mess." but rather "That dang America - it's THEIR fault."

Nothing makes my heart pitter-patter faster than reading that a freakin doctor would say that America should be bombed and set on her heels because Israel and Palestine are fighting once again.

Oh please.

America has enough internal problems and messes that we have to fix by ourselves and if i were President i'd close all the borders, stop all import/export and work like a mad dog to get our country back on track and then see who the big babies are.

But then again, i'm still cranky and really fed up with the world's whiners ...not to mention America's whiners.

i need chocolate or someone is going to seriously get injured....and don't complain about your injury you big baby.

101 Things in 1001 days

I got this idea from http://bethmorrissey.wordpress.com/

And i've even stolen some of her ideas - and hope that's ok Beth.....but i'm kinda slow sometimes and so...

Here's my list. I am starting it today and will re-evaluate by October 5, 2011.

Reading
1. Read through the Bible from front to back.
2. Read all the books on my classics list
3. Read The Economist every month
4. Read something that I totally don’t agree with (either religiously/politically, etc)
5. ReRead the Narnia Series

Writing
6. Write in my blog a minimum of three times a week.
7. Write some essays or edit ones I’ve already written
8. Submit a transcript for a children’s book
9. Write the transcript for a children’s book

Arithmetic
10. Invest in a MacBook
11. Investigate how to do a slow spending year or couple of months
12. Become totally debt free – including mortgage
13. Become more involved in my investments

Health and Wellness
14. Thirty minutes of yoga three times a week for one month. (0/12)
15. Visit the dentist for a real appointment
16. Pamper myself to a spa
17. Begin vitamin/barley green regiment
18. Take a morning walk every weekday for two weeks. (0/14)
19. Eat organicially for two months
20. Do the 21-day “Daniel” fast

Food and Drink
21. Totally re-do pantry
22. Learn to bake good bread
23. Learn to make really good pie crust
24. Eat soup for lunch for one week. (0/7)
25. Learn to forage in the woods edible things – do research before foraging
26. Go a week without soda. (0/7)
27. Make chocolate/lemon cake for sister for no reason other than just because
28. Drink a glass of milk per day for a month. (0/30)
29. Drink only water for one week. (0/7)
30. Eat a hot breakfast everyday for one week. (0/7)
31. Buy organic products and free range meats
32. Check out the co-op in Lancaster

Fashion and Beauty
33. Go through my shoes and donate some to charity or throw out
34. Moisturise feet nightly for two weeks. (3/14)
35. Moisturise hands daily for one month. (3/30)
36. Wear red lipstick.-Done 1/6/09
37. Get my hair cut short(this one scares me)
38. Have a facial.
39. Have a professional makeup consultation.
40. Find an all-purpose dress to keep in my wardrobe.
41. Invest in good lingerie
42. Get a pedicure.
43. Find another skirt style that looks great on me

Crafty, Crafty
44. Learn how to sew
45. Learn how to knit
46. Complete three cross-stitching projects (0/3)
47. Learn about crocheting.
48. Learn how to fix things in my own home

Travel and Tourism
49. Go to Ireland.
50. Go to the Philadelphia Zoo.
51. Go to the Cape May Zoo
52. Return to Paris
53. Go to at least four operas
54. Become a Reading Royals fan
55. Go to a European Christmas market.
56. See tulips in Holland.
57. Visit three states never been to before in the US

Charitable
58. Donate old clothing to Good Will
59. Use all shoe boxes for Operation Christmas Child

Spiritual
60. Find and use a daily devotional for one year. (0/365)
61. Attend church every Sunday
62. Keep a gratitude journal for one month. (0/30)

Everyday Fun
63. Buy myself flowers from the florist
64. Buy flower boxes for front windows
65. Get a new set of everyday dishes. - Done 1.08.09
66. Take a photograph every day for a month. (0/30)
67. Make a “dinner music” playlist.
68. Have a games day/night.
69. Order holiday cards from Etsy.
70. Spend a weekend at home without turning on the computer.
71. Afternoon tea with Person X.
72. Send 10 random “thinking of you” cards. (0/10)
73. Send flowers to someone for no reason.
74. Get an iPod and learn how to use it
75. Compile an iTunes library
76. Update address book.
77. Take a French class.
78. Listen to all songs in my iTunes library.
79. Play in the rain.
80. Have a picnic in the park.
81. Get up at 4am for one week. (0/7)
82. Make a will.
83. Stargaze.
84. Really consider if want to get a Master’s degree
85. Consider changing careers
86. Ask a random guy out for dinner
87. Have at least 10 fancy dinners in my house (0/10)
88. Change my garden
89. Garden veggies at my folks’ house
90. Send random ‘Thank you for investing in my life’ cards or emails
91. Get involved in my political party
92. Find a mentor for whole eating/slow year living
93. Adopt an older person at a nursing home
94. Play the piano as much as possible
95. Go to the movies more – even if alone
96. Find a really good friend
97. Eat at the Afghan restaurant in Philadelphia
98. Eat a small piece of chocolate everyday (exceptions: while on 21-day fast)

And the Formalities
99. Write a blog post for each completed item.
100. Donate $2.00 for each unfinished item to a charity of my choosing.
101. Write a new list for the next 1001 days.

My head might explode

There is so much in my mind to sort out and put down in a logical manner but in the meantime, my poor little head might just blow up with all that i'm trying to give some time and attention to.

For instance the stupid war between Israel and Palestine, Putin turning off the gas, our own Congress and Senate

THOSE FOUR THINGS ALONE COULD MAKE ME CRAZY

i also want to seriously start making changes in the way i live and eat and care for my body, house, yard, etc. i will not become some crazy burkenstock wearing tree hugger**, but i sure could do alot better in how i handle what's been given to us. AND i have some New Year Goals that i'd also like to jot down but can't always find the time between my movie watching and sleeping (why does one slow down so much during winter??) and working two jobs and...and a...and did i mention my car's inspection ran out months ago and i've still not gotten it to the shop?

i think i need a secretary.

***there is nothing wrong with being a crazy burkenstock wearing tree hugger, i'm just feeling mean today. So just "take it where you shake it"

YAY no tub in the dining room

But...but there is surely a problem and i'll have to deal with it. It's at times like these that i wish:
1) i had a handyman for a boyfriend/close friend/friend locked in the attic
2) i was able to do these things for myself.

i want to re-do my bathroom anyway and have thought about starting to rip out the floor tiles to see how bad things are..and to also begin to take down the nasty shower thing-y walls and go buy the tile i want.

The problem is that i have an idea how to do this but not the actual knowledge. BUT i don't want to pay someone else big bucks to do it so i might just try it myself (no worries, i won't try to do the plumbing alone..well probably not). It's kinda exciting to know that i can either totally repair my own house or totally ruin it.

Power. Sheer power, folks

Hopefully It's Not an Indication of THINGS TO COME

As i was getting ready for work this morning, i heard a dripping sound. Odd since it wasn't raining outside and i went toward the dripping noise to investigate.

The dripping seems to be coming through the ceiling from my tub. Water was all over the dining room floor.

And if i go home tonight and find my entire bathroom has crashed through the floor into the dining room, i might just find a cave in which to hide for the entirety of 2009.