Saturday, November 11, 2006


i've taken on another job - in addition to what i work full-time and in addition to my other part-time job.  This job is being a cashier at a clothing store in a local mall.  A large clothing store.  There are many customers of all ages.  my favourites are the ones who's head is just above the counter.  Either male or female matters not, they are wide-eyed in watching 'that store girl' fold the clothes and scan the bar codes and tell the total - and let's not even forget taking off security tags and wrapping delicate things - and taking the money or showing how to use the credit card machine...sometimes they watch a book or stuffed animal of their disappear into the bag.

i remember well the pure excitement of going shopping with my paretns when i was young.  Once when i was four-years old, i was with my parents and we left one place and the next stop was Sears.  We had a tan and white VW bus and my father said, (as he always did) "Watch your fingers, nose and toes"  which was the code that he was going to close the sliding door...but that time, i dind't heed his warning and got my fingers smashed in the door.

He quickly opened it and i was ok..just bruised, but it scared my mother (who was hugely pregnant with my sister - and very hormonal) and she held me on her lap and we both cried  (no seatbelts back then!!)

my mother was so upset she just wanted to go home and put ice on my hand.  i was upset because  "pleeeeease Mommmieeee, i wannnttt to goooooo to Searrrrrrssss"  sniff, sniff

And as i watch these young ones, watching me, i learn an unspoken life lesson.

Never lose your sense of wide-eyed wonder.

And sometimes even with smashed fingers, a girl's got to go to Sears!


Sunday, November 5, 2006

What kind of love that must be!

i just got back from a long autumn walk, air is just perfect for such things and i decided to walk through our local, old and grand cemetery.  Now stick with me for a minute - it's broad daylight, quiet in there and has paved roads.  Peaceful.  i've never walked in there but think it might become some place i will be going often.

Anyway - as i was walking, i looked at some of the tombstones just because i'm curious and more than once i saw where a wife would die (1907 seemed to be a bad year) and a couple of months later the husband would die.  Now perhaps it was because of infulenza or some other disease, but i've also heard and seen where a spouce will just 'give up' and die quite soon after their loved one.

Why is this?  Is it because the love the two had between them was so powerful and strong that when one half of the love was gone, life wasn't worth living any longer?   And why does it seem that men, in all of their strength and manliness, seem to 'give up' before a woman will, in this matter?

And why does it seem that such things used to happen but not so much any other words, has something changed in the way we love that we don't give ALL of us when we do so?

Odd things to ponder while walking, but in all honesty, these things make me wonder.

hmm...more to write on this but perhaps should think it through longer.