Home. What a delicious word. i love going away. Especially to Europe - it fuels me towards higher fashion - toward a more graceful way of living. But i love coming home.
Monday, July 11, 2005
Monday - WOW...beautiful castle...great people. ok food.
I think i was meant to live in a castle....just born in the wrong time period . This one was built in 1894-1895 - amazing. Until the Soviets came through and destroyed what it had once been.....
Friday, July 8, 2005
So today is the day to jet-set accross the ocean and see what lies on the other side. And if i'm not mistaken, that would be Europe <grin>.
I have a problem with planes. Not afraid, not even a little bit. My problem is that i turn into this little girl who is going someplace nice and is so excited that she wants to kick the back of the seat and ask every 10 min if we're there yet.... I would think, after all this time and being somewhat more mature than a 6 yr old, that i could sink into my plane seat, read for a few hours and then slip into dreamland, waking refreshed and dewey faced for the adventures of whatever country the plane lands.
But no, sadly, quite the opposite, save for the reading bit. i want to look out of the window to see where we are. However, since it is the middle of the night flying over the ocean and Greenland - there's nothing to see(although i must get to Greenland someday). So i look out into space -hoping to see something of interest, but alas that doesn't happen and then there is no leg room and i can't sleep and are we there yet and if that child doesn't stop crying i'm going to scream and ... and... and... ::sigh:::
So this trip, i've decided to do something different. i've messed up my body clock by staying up till odd hours and not sleeping much. Maybe this way, i'll be able to slip into dreamland and arrive looking refreshed instead of my normal zombie look. Maybe. Nice thing about jet lag is that is only lasts for a day or two, so by Monday, i'll be myself again.
But if you're in Hungary this weekend and you see a zombie-like woman, trying her best to look like a super model while really looking quite the opposite, feel free to say 'hello.'
Thursday, July 7, 2005
Monday, July 4, 2005
i love the ocean. i love the roar of the waves. i even love the annoying sand that gets everywhere. i love it because with the crashing of the waves upon the beach, the hot sun on my skin and friends and relatives around me, i am reminded all is well. The rhythm of life is felt in those waves, the future of our country is in the small children who dip their toes into the cold water and run screaming from the waves, or the small ones who stand, brave and terrified at the same time, sick ones feel better with the healing sea breeze, skin becomes tanned, hearts heal, problems are solved and love is rekindled. All at the shore. Come on in, the water's fine.
Saturday, July 2, 2005
The weekend is finally here. i'm glad because it's been a rough week. More surgery for my brother, accusations from a co-worker that were totally unfounded, misunderstandings, financial setback, car problems, disappointments, hurts, boredom, too hot, a grandfather who is insisting upon surgery even though a doctor told him that he may not survive because of heart problems and broken promises -lend for a miserable outlook. i woke up this morning with the same tension in my shoulders that i went to bed with - but worse. This trip to Hungary is coming at the absolute worst time. And i am feeling sorry for myself. (can you tell? <wry grin>)
BUT - it is a gorgeous day today. The humidity finally is lower. There is a breeze. The sun is shining. i woke up. i'm healthy. my house is still standing. my car wasn't stolen. my coffee tasted wonderful this morning. i get to spend time in the garden - weeding and watering my flowers. i'm not having surgery. my brother is getting better. i am going to hungary. i have a wonderful family and good neighbors. i am employed.
i have to decide today that even though i feel that life has kicked me in the face this week and i feel defeated, unwanted, miserable, sad and lonely, that my attitude is a choice. i can determine the outcome of my day solely based upon my attitude. i would rather sit around today and cry and pout and throw a temper tantram - that would feel great, but that really isn't who i want to be. i'd rather meet such things - as this awful week - with quiet grace and determination to do better next week. Not denying my emotions and i probably do need a good cry, but realizing that one week isn't the end of it all. Today is a brand new day - no mistakes, no hurts, no misunderstandings, no pain. Might not be that way all day, but for now, in the quietness of my heart and house, i will embrace the day, thank God for my life and all that i have - including wonderful loved ones, friends and family, and go weed my garden.
Come with me - let's have a day of quiet grace.
Friday, July 1, 2005
Have you ever had an expectation of something good to come to you and then it doesn't happen? Or that you were supposed to meet up with a friend or loved one and they call at the last minute to cancel - or worse, never show up at all? Sometimes i think that handling disappointment graciously is a very difficult thing ..... but i'm trying.