Friday, December 8, 2006

Butt head?

What is it about underwear and the word 'butt' that can make a three year old boy go into gales of laughter?  Or when his dad tells him if he puts his underwear on his head then he'll be a 'butt-head' and the child giggles and giggles?

And why, since i'm on the subject, do boys grow into Men but never out of laughing at such things?

Believe me, when you're three, it's adorable. When you're 103 it's adorable.  Anything inbetween?

Not so much.

Wednesday, December 6, 2006

Reading list

In the new year, i've determined to read classics (with an occasional 'fun' read now and then). i've got the list, i'm searching for the books and i'm already overwhelmed!  How am i ever going to get through this huge list?  Why am i doing this? How will i fit it into my already crazy schedule?  uh...not sure...but..

So it's a goal... a New Year's goal.  i have others  -some that i've been planning throughout this year, some that are a continuation of 2006..

i like to plan new things for new years.  Not really resolutions, more like a continuation of becoming the person i wish to be.  And so for 2007, i want to read my 100+ classics and see how they change me or not.

However, bookcase space WILL be a problem.  Maybe a goal for the new year is to find a hunky carpentar to build some new ones for me.

Hmmmm......Now THAT'S an incentive to read, no?

Monday, December 4, 2006

Nice and cold

This morning dipped down to a nice and brisk 31F.  When i stepped out of my cozy home, the cold air hit me with a rush and i breathed deeply.  The frigid air made me feel more alive,awake and ready to tackle all that this day has in store for me.  All we need to make it complete is some snow - but that's a long way off for us on the east coast, i'm afraid.

This Christmas my sweet little neices will be coming from sunny Florida to visit.  The older (the one with whom i splashed in puddles) has been praying every night since July that we'll have snow for Christmas.  i'm thinking we should be prepared for a blizzard!  LOL

i sure do enjoy this time of year...nice and cold.

Saturday, November 11, 2006


i've taken on another job - in addition to what i work full-time and in addition to my other part-time job.  This job is being a cashier at a clothing store in a local mall.  A large clothing store.  There are many customers of all ages.  my favourites are the ones who's head is just above the counter.  Either male or female matters not, they are wide-eyed in watching 'that store girl' fold the clothes and scan the bar codes and tell the total - and let's not even forget taking off security tags and wrapping delicate things - and taking the money or showing how to use the credit card machine...sometimes they watch a book or stuffed animal of their disappear into the bag.

i remember well the pure excitement of going shopping with my paretns when i was young.  Once when i was four-years old, i was with my parents and we left one place and the next stop was Sears.  We had a tan and white VW bus and my father said, (as he always did) "Watch your fingers, nose and toes"  which was the code that he was going to close the sliding door...but that time, i dind't heed his warning and got my fingers smashed in the door.

He quickly opened it and i was ok..just bruised, but it scared my mother (who was hugely pregnant with my sister - and very hormonal) and she held me on her lap and we both cried  (no seatbelts back then!!)

my mother was so upset she just wanted to go home and put ice on my hand.  i was upset because  "pleeeeease Mommmieeee, i wannnttt to goooooo to Searrrrrrssss"  sniff, sniff

And as i watch these young ones, watching me, i learn an unspoken life lesson.

Never lose your sense of wide-eyed wonder.

And sometimes even with smashed fingers, a girl's got to go to Sears!


Sunday, November 5, 2006

What kind of love that must be!

i just got back from a long autumn walk, air is just perfect for such things and i decided to walk through our local, old and grand cemetery.  Now stick with me for a minute - it's broad daylight, quiet in there and has paved roads.  Peaceful.  i've never walked in there but think it might become some place i will be going often.

Anyway - as i was walking, i looked at some of the tombstones just because i'm curious and more than once i saw where a wife would die (1907 seemed to be a bad year) and a couple of months later the husband would die.  Now perhaps it was because of infulenza or some other disease, but i've also heard and seen where a spouce will just 'give up' and die quite soon after their loved one.

Why is this?  Is it because the love the two had between them was so powerful and strong that when one half of the love was gone, life wasn't worth living any longer?   And why does it seem that men, in all of their strength and manliness, seem to 'give up' before a woman will, in this matter?

And why does it seem that such things used to happen but not so much any other words, has something changed in the way we love that we don't give ALL of us when we do so?

Odd things to ponder while walking, but in all honesty, these things make me wonder.

hmm...more to write on this but perhaps should think it through longer.

Monday, October 23, 2006

Where have i been?

Good grief!  i cannot believe that it's been so long since i last posted!  Where did the time go and what was i doing that prohibited me from posting?  Who knows! LOL

Here it is October, my favourite time of the year.  i just love the smell of the fallen leaves and the feel of the warm sun yet the crispness of the air. i love having four seasons (though the joke for PA is that we have winter, winter, almost winter and road construction as our 'seasons').  Not quite true although it's quite cool today.

i've done a ton of reading this summer as well and only have about seven unread books in my "to read" book pile.  That alone, is a mark of time well spent.  After i'm finished with these i think i'd like to dive back in to many of the classics and reaqaint myself with them.

And i am mourning the terrible loss of my favourite (American) football team.  Philadelphia Eagles.  Ok first of all - they shouldn't play in Florida - i have NO doubt that had they been in Philadelphia, the game would've been completely different.  It was a perfect football day here. Cloudy, temp in the low 50's, breezy - our guys would have excelled and McNabb would've not have to lost his breakfast on National Television.  Yeah, he'll not live that one down for quite some time i'm thinking.  Secondly, it was a game that they played horribly..they are a better team than that and quite frankly they didn't bring their A game...or B or C...  And what's with a 62 yrd fied goal?  Goodnight nurse nancy - that was ridiculous...the guy misses on 28 yrds yet can do a 62 yrd???  Check his blood!  ok ok enough moaning about football - even my favorite of favorites, Brian Dawkins, was quiet - and man when he gets fired up - watch out...that fierce expression that he gets on his face makes me weak in the, i'm serious...weak....

i hope to be a better blogger...i was lovingly chastised by a friend ((((((((cary)))))))) to get a move on..and i will!!!

Sunday, July 23, 2006


What a summer we've had.  Unusual rain.  High heat and humidity and all before August. 

But today, today is gorgeous thus far.  The temperature is in the mid 70's, the  humidity is low, there is a generous breeze that makes my lace curtains dance with joy.  The sounds of the locust in nearby trees telling us all that summer is almost over. The neighborhood is relatively quiet, which is always welcomed.  i'm lying on my bed reading Hemimgway.  It's a beautiful day.

Where has it gone?  Mercy but time goes all to quickly these days, i think.

And yes, in the midst of the beauty i'm experiencing, i cannot forget that the Middle East and Persian Gulf and Korea are in turmoil.  While i'm enjoying a lovely day, relaxing, doing some chores, a meeting later on...there are men and women, in full combat gear, either patrolling or fighting.  There are Lebanese and Israelis who are waiting for the next bomb, or mortar rounds to fall.  There are Iraqis who are wondering if the person in front of them in line is a cowardly homicide bomber.  There are Koreans who preface their day by wondering if war will also break out for them.  And on all fronts, on all sides, there are regular non-military people who just want to live a happy and peaceful life.  i don't like war - but it is, to me, a necessary evil sometimes.  And in remembering all of this, i think makes my day, here in Pennsylvania, US, even more sweet.  Taking nothing for granted, feeling blessed.

Summer 2006

Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Wee bit cranky

yes, that's right, i'm cranky.  Went to bed with a huge headache last night.  That's gone but now my stomach is doing crazy things.  And i'm tired.  And i'm mad (at who or what is a mystery, just mankind in general).  And i hate things that go on in our world...the evil, the hurt, the lies, the deceit.  Why can't everyone just live their own life and do it decently and in order?

And why can't folks remember to say 'goodbye' when they're leaving for a few days?

And why do online friends all of a sudden just 'go away' without warning, without allowing closure?

And where's the Advil?

And the coffee?

And the vodka.....

Especially the vodka...

 Edit:  AHA...who knew that three small squares of dark chocolate could lift one's mood.  Lovely!

Monday, June 26, 2006

Auntie Mame

So today it rained...and rained and rained.  Sunshine would follow and then more rain. Warm delicious summer rain.

my niece (2 yrs old) is visiting with her mother from Florida and being the ever mischievous one, i took her to play in the mud puddles.  she was in her bathing suit, i was in my work clothes (i didn't jump in the puddles...much).    Then we took a quick dip in my parents' pool to get all the dirt off (sorry, Dad) and ended up shivering cold...

When the rest of the family heard that i was the one who took her mud puddle jumping - i was dubbed "Auntie Mame"...though i assure you i don't have a living room where the couches move up and down on pulley systems.

No matter how old you get, or how refined and proper you can be, one should never ever lose the wonder and beauty of playing in the rain.  Sometimes it takes a two-year old, blonde haired, blue eyed angel to teach you that.

To Shoe or Not to Shoe

As much as i love shoes (multiple posts on that!) and high heels to be exact, i love also going barefoot. i love the feel of the cool tiles under my feet in the kitchen or the smoothness of the wood flooring in the living room. i love the carpet from the second floor, but what i love the most is to be barefoot outside in the grass.  It connects me with the earth, espcially if i'm gardening - which i love to do.  i don't particularly like to be in mud but even that can be tolerated if necessary.

Love barefeet but i sure do love those some cute ones on today.

Thursday, June 22, 2006

A New Challenge

As if my life isn't busy enough, i've decided to teach myself to play the organ.  Our church's organ.  A big organ.  i'm clueless and should really take lessons, but i've been practicing and can now at least play some hymns without sounding as if we are all going to a funeral. 


But fun.

There aren't many organists these days.  Keyboards have all but done away with the need to learn how to play one, But there is, to me, a bit of a fascitnation with the organ.

So i'll give it a go.

ps.  i might give spelling lessons a 'go' as well.  Let's try fascination.  Better?

Tuesday, June 20, 2006

Peaceful Tuesday

i'm listening to classical music via web today and most of what they are playing is peaceful and quiet and i find myself very calm inside.  Serene.  At rest. Happy.

And a bit sleepy as well!  ::sleepy smile::

Monday, June 19, 2006

Monday ramblings

This thing we call living takes so many shapes and sizes, twists and turns that sometimes when we end up at the end, we are amazed at what it took to get us there.

How can you go from the mundane to the spectaculor?  How can you acheive that place where life is good?  What does it take? 

Is it ever ok to be obsessed with someone or something?

If you really, really hate your job, should you stay just because you like your co-workers?

Should you ever lick your fork while at the dinner table?

Why are picnics so appealing?

Minus the ants...

But with a good friend or a loved one and a good book....

Would the ants then be welcomed?

Why do i have a hunger to read and know things..yet have a terrible time retaining that information..?

Why am i so restless today?

Friday, June 16, 2006

Should a 12-yr old girl get married?

Saw on a most interesting story:

There's just soooo much to say on this - most of it quite funny, but i don't even know where to start.

Guess it's better than having a car accident and your dead wife's head flying off the dash board

And if you follow politics, you will understand when i wonder if it's worse to have cash in your freezer, or a severed head in your be the judge.
What an odd world!

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Moses, the not-so-attack cat

i have cat.  His name is Moses.  He is about six years old and just a cute now as when he was a kitten. He used to catch all sorts of critters and i never had to worry about a spider or fly or anything creep like that.  He once brought me a freshly dead mouse for my birthday.  i tried not to shriek like a little girl.

Tonight, Moses saw a HUGE ant in my hallway.  He laid down and watched it.  For 20 minutes.  Finally, i had enough of said ant and sent him/her to an early prize in the sky..aka. ant meets Jesus on a Wednesday night.

i don't think Moses is such a good catcher of all things crawly and creepy.  Guess i'll have to practice my shriek!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Too Many Voices

i have a bad habit of reading more than one book at a time.  For instance:  currently i'm reading Flaubert's Madame Bovary and Faulkner's As I Lay Dying.  Not good.  Although the story lines are strong enough for each book to not be confused, the difference in 'voice' is so opposite that i find myself dealing with too many voices in my head (no comments!) 

So..i've decided to finish one and then tackle the other.  As I Lay Dying is almost complete and i just love it.  The writing is so noisy.  i love the line "My mother is a fish. Jewel's mother is a horse but my mother is a fish...."

Anyway...on to reading! 

Monday, June 5, 2006

A Girl-child

Just found out that my Brother and sister-in-law will most likely be having another girl!  WOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Thursday, June 1, 2006

Ice cream truck

In the days of fast everything, when stores are only a few blocks away and everyone buys huge quantities of 'bulk' sure is nice to hear the ice cream truck come around.

Of course, in August, when i've heard that song for the umteenth time, i may change my tune, so to speak, but for now, it reminds me of days gone by when life was a bit less harried and the biggest commotion of the day was not the rush to work and traffic jams, but riding my bike at breakneck speeds down the mountain and the wonderful sounds of the ice cream truck.

i think if he comes around tonight, i'll indulge in a bit of a treat.


Tuesday, May 30, 2006


So, uh today i broke a toe.  Great.  Right foot.  Middle toe.  It's swollen and purple and hurts.

Oh  joy!

Monday, May 29, 2006

Happy Memorial Day

To those who have served in the military, or are serving:  Thank you.

Because of your sacrifice, dedication to Country and ability to follow the commands of those in charge through the years, i am able to not only embrace my feminity but write freely about it.  i, as a woman, am able to be educated and drive and own my own house and teach others and wear short skirts and talk/have frienships with people from any other nation, if i so choose.  i am not restricted to how many children i could bear.  i am able to work and have whatever job i like and am qualified for.  i am able to walk about freely.  i can sing at the top of my lungs.

Thank you.

Sunday, May 28, 2006

Visual Peace

Another gorgeous day.  The sun is hot, but the breeze is cool and clear.  i love days like this.  All the windows in my house are wide open allowing the air and sunshine to permeate every room.  my house is perfectly cleaned and everywhere you look there is visual peace.

Visual peace is so important.  Life, work, school, relationships take our time and attention and everyone needs a place where they can relax.   i have chosen to make my entire house like that.  i don't like clutter. (ok...except i DO have too many books lying about), i certainly don't like a dirty house, i like clean surfaces and straightened bed covers.  Because when i walk in the house after a long day, or have faced something that stresses me or upsets me, i like to find refuge and peace in my own home.

Scented candles, lots of bubble bath, living plants, and even my crazy cat all provide a sense of peace and security.  i look around my rooms and can relax a bit because i know that hard work and keeping them clean then provide me with a wonderful place to unwind and sleep.

Only thing that would make it better, would be a swarthy half-dressed Man to greet me!

Now THAT would be visual peace!     :::grin::::

Saturday, May 27, 2006

Living large

i love living in the city and for me to say that - me, who grew up on the side of a mountain, stomping in creeks, swimming in the river, walking in the woods - for me to say such a thing is a BIG deal

But here i sit - my house is clean and smells great - classical music is on my stereo, i can hear the many birds outside, i can hear some traffic going by, and i can hear the Mexican ladies who live not far away as they talk in their kitchen and hear the slaps of their hands against the tortillas as they make them.  Much laughter.  i see the man in the next house fixing his screen for his front window - the staple gun making a punching sound - these are all comforting sounds to me now.  Granted i live in a section that is almost always a bit more quiet, but all in all -  i love living in the city.

Think i'll go read on the front porch for a while...

Thursday, May 25, 2006

No sleep again? This has got to stop! Someone please help me!!!!
Friday night i'm going to resort to an adult beverage. i'm so sleepy right now but know better than to even close my eyes or there will be no sleep again tonight.
i mean, it's getting so bad that i'm organizing the kitchen so i can bake at 4am

Wednesday, May 24, 2006

Here i am again

Oh the joy to be awake at 4am.  Until now, i slept deep and peacefully but for the past hour, i've been awake.  i even was medicated due to back spasms on Tuesday.

Why can't i sleep???? grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Maybe i should just get up and make chocolate chip cookies.  Want some?




Tuesday, May 23, 2006

Can't sleep

It's 4.13am.  i'm wide awake.  i've been awake for over an hour.  There's too much on my mind and i need to relax and sleep but it's not happening.

i'm not hungry, i'm not cold, i'm not angry, i'm not sad, i'm not happy, i'm just....not sleeping.


Sunday, May 21, 2006

Another shoe man in the making

Just a few minutes ago, i was leaving church, walking down the steps to exit the building and at the bottom of the steps was a group of children.  They were between the ages of 5 and 9 or so.

i was walking down carefully, in my 4" shiny patent leather shoes and noticed that one little boys' eyes were rivited to my shoes. Not to me, not to my legs or skirt, but only my feet.  And i wondered what was going on in his little head.  Had he looked at me -i would have given him an understanding smile because i love to look at them too and understand the attraction to a pair of shoes, but he never lifted his eyes.

And as i've stated before, i hope that when he grows up, the love of his life will wear shoes for him that are pretty on her and that make him stare in love and lust for her.

i so love being a woman!

Thursday, May 11, 2006


We're under a tornado watch here in my little city in Pennsylvania.  The wind is blowing quite hard and the much needed rain is pelting my freshly washed windows! (grrrr)

Monday, May 8, 2006

Emotional ...

In honor of  "Pats" going to the Gulf and those who will go with him....

(beware - emotional clip)


my work ethic took a day off today and forgot to inform me.  grrrr - i'd rather be home, curled up on the couch while reading. 

A friend from the chat room is leaving for the Persian Gulf today.  Thoughts and prayers are with him.  He will be missed - espcially around football season (who is going to monopolize the conversation and make us talk about football for days and days and days?  grrrr)

Had a wonderful lazy weekend.  Boy did i need that.  Cleaned and read.  That's it. (oh yeah and cooked and re-orgainzed some things and ....)  But it was wonderful.  Though it makes today very difficult.

Gas prices are killing me.  Don't have a terribly long commute (40 min) but it's not fun.  i really wish we had a better public tranportation system everywhere in the country, not just the big cities.  That is something i truly miss about France/Europe.

Reading Suite Francaise - great book to read, not so great for my longing to be back in Paris.

Good friend of mine is in the hospital ..grrr...i'm so sad for him.  But he knows we are pulling for him and that he'll recover and get through physcial therapy with flying colours.

New pair of heels are coming to me this week.  Very Marilyn Monroe-ish..gorgeous, can't wait.

Did i mention my work ethic has taken a vacation day?  hmm...

Maybe another cup of coffee will help!

Friday, May 5, 2006

Beware: Rant Ahead (not pretty)

..sick of the 'poor me' attitude.  i'm tired of the victim mentality.  i get weary of hearing  'i can't take one more thing.'  i try to be compassionate - i really do, but i'm tired of it.  There is always someone worse off than you. 

Deal with it. 

Life isn't always easy but your attitude can help you get through it. 

Good grief, you're a grown woman, so act like it.  You're not some sniveling child, nor a naive teen; you've had children, many of them; you have a husband who loves you and has a decent job; you own a lovely house; you have two cars; you are not terminally ill;  you are smart and funny; you are attractive in many ways, including physical; you have alot going for you.

You wonder why i don't come around to spend time with you?  i can't take it anymore.  i have my own stuff to deal with and try to do so with a good attitude and happiness.  You drag me down.  You make me want to move far away.  Stop acting like everything should be handed to you on a silver platter.  Stop moping around.  Depressed?  Seek help. Angry?  Work out.  Eat better.  Take your dang blood pressure pills. 

You fuss about your gorgeous teenaged girls like you hate them.  i'm sick of that too.  Do you realize that i may never be granted the beauty of children and when i have to hear you go on and on about them, i could honestly reach out and hit you...hard.

Grow up.

i love you now and always will, but i don't like you very much right now.

i'm done.

Tuesday, May 2, 2006

Rambling words

i'm in an odd mood of sorts.  Partly because some of the intense stress of March and April is gone.  Partly because i seem to have a new focus on life.  Partly because it's Spring and all things are new - including attitudes. 

Here's an odd thing - for four months, i purposedly had my cable turned off.  i didn't miss television one bit.  There were times, i guess, that i could've used the mindless chatter to help me wind down, or times when perhaps a good documentary or movie was on and it would've been nice to see but... all in all, i didn't miss it. 

i'm having it re-installed - because i need the dsl (for my aol addiction and for business). i wonder how i will react to the stupidity that is handed to us on a daily basis.  i'm no snob - not at all - nor a great intellectual - but honestly, some of the shows that are on are just rubbish.

i've been, instead, burying my sweet lil nose and mind in books.  Re-reading some old favourites and discovering some new ones.  my dear friend and (((((((((((Sister))))))))) gave me two recent recommendations and i bought them both trusting her judgement.  Sure enough, as i delved into one (Balzac and The Little Chinese Seamstress) last night, i once again was grateful for her knowledge and insight.  She also sent me two others last year or so and they were winners!  (thank you sister!!!!)

Which brings me to this:  good friends are treasures.  Those who take time to get to know us - deeply and richly with all our prickles and rough edges - are pure gold.  Those who provide stress relief or an undersatnding mind or a hug (cyber or real) are considered, to me, amoung the best of mankind.

And those who make us (read:me) laugh - well they have a special place in my heart - because, if you know me, you KNOW i love to laugh.

Friday, April 28, 2006

It hurts...

Today is the kind of day you spend dreaming about during the winter.  The sky is a deep blue, not a cloud in sight.  The sun is bright and warm.  The breeze is soft and a little cool.  Different shades of green meet your eye and go right to the 'pleasure' part of your brain, while you try to comprehend the magnificent colours of trees and flowers; shrubs and bushes.  It is so beautiful that is causes you to ache inside.  Not sure why, not a terribly painful ache, but it hurts...just a little. 

How can we, fallible humans, be allowed to enjoy such beauty?  How is it possible that the bleak grayness of this past winter has given way to such wealth of colour and we are able to enjoy it?  What gives us permission to bask in this springtime glory? 

Makes me feel insignificant and small...but also very content and peaceful.  Today is the kind of day that i wish to be outdoors until the sun sets, walking in freshly greened grass or lounging on a blanket enjoying a picnic..

The forecast for the weekend is supposed to be the same as today.  i hope it is.  Three days of fantastic Spring.  So hurts.

Good time of the year to be born.

Thursday, April 20, 2006

ONE. Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.

TWO. Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.

THREE. Don't believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.

FOUR. When you say, "I love you," mean it.

FIVE. When you say, "I'm sorry," look the person in the eye.

SIX. Be engaged at least six months before you get married.

SEVEN. Believe in love at first sight.

EIGHT. Never laugh at anyone's dream. People who don't have dreams don't have much.

NINE. Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it's the only way to live life completely.

TEN.. In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

ELEVEN. Don't judge people by their relatives.

TWELVE. Talk slowly but think quickly.

THIRTEEN. When someone asks you a question you don't want to answer, smile and ask, "Why do you want to know?"

FOURTEEN. Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.

FIFTEEN. Say "bless you" when you hear someone sneeze.

SIXTEEN. When you lose, don't lose the lesson

SEVENTEEN. Remember the three R's: Respect for self; Respect for others; and Responsibility for all your actions.

EIGHTEEN. Don't let a little dispute injure a great friendship.

NINETEEN. When you realize you've made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

TWENTY. Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.

TWENTY-ONE. Spend some time alone.

Saturday, April 15, 2006

Oh my word! Pull out already!

Today is a fabulous day - warm, breezy, very very nice.  i have some windows open and the sounds of the wakening city are coming in with the breeze.  Earlier i heard the children playing and someone was mowing their grass, adults talking and laughing - all very pleasant sounds.

However -- for the past 10 minutes, i've been listening to a man help a woman back her car out of the garage. Yes, ten...ten long minutes of..."back a little more, turn your straighten it up, pull forward,,! no!  wait!  Stop! ok, try again...a little more, no..."  AND ON AND ON.  i've watched from my bedroom window as this tiny lil red car was trying to weasel it's way out of a very large garage.

Good grief...get out and push it - would be easier, perhaps!

Sheesh!  Women drivers!

Thursday, April 13, 2006

Women are Funny Creatures

Funny things happen at work from time to time - not 'HA-HA' funny but certainly humorous to me.

i wear skirts/dresses almost all the time - there are very few exceptions to this.  i do so just to embrace my feminity and to look more polished/put together.  i am NOT though stuck-up or's just that i like how i feel when wearing a skirt..and a short, swing-y one in the warm months makes for a lot of i've heard ::cough, cough::

But i digress.

So...that being said, there are a few female co-workers who hardly ever wear a skirt but whenever they do, they come show me right away!  How fun is that?  And today  - one of the gals brought down her student worker, who was wearing an adorable skirt...

It just makes me smile happily to see other women able to enjoy dressing femme and i love making a fuss over them. 

Too bad i couldn't turn that into a business.

Make a  no?  ok..well, it was just a thought!

Thursday, April 6, 2006

Drama, drama, drama

 Last night we had play practice which was in preparation for this Sunday's performance.  This musical is set in Jerusalem during Holy Week.  Choir, soloists and cast make up the entire thing.  Due to some odd circumstances, i've found myself the drama director just very recently.  i have no experience in this...other than any acting i did in high school (i was Jezebel in one play...and King Ahab was my boyfriend's brother - very handsome - hmm...good memories.  i had to stand and yell "Kill them!" or something else just as pleasant.  Needless to say "them" were glad that later in the story, Jezebel throws herself out of the castle window and dies and less than glorious death.)  But i digress...

So..yes, inexperienced, though i do have an active imagination and can picture how it might play (no pun intended) out.  Last night, we all were a bit stressed and feeling the pressure and one guy kept making little ad lib comments - sort of under his breath - but they were absolutely hysterical.

We renamed the musical:  The Borrowed Tomb: A Holy Week Comedy.

(ok, that's not funny - but it was at 10.30pm last night...)

Monday, April 3, 2006

Pick a Job..any job

When i complained about my job via email to my sister (16 yrs old), she replied: could work waitressing or housekeeping on a cruise ship, or become a funeral singer, a wedding arranger, a firefighter, a professional ski jumper, a haidresser or a clothes designer could just ruin government property and hold someone hostage and become wanted nation-wide : ))...i think you should start playing the lottery lol
love ya

A funeral singer??? Is there such a thing?  A funeral singer??????
i can't stop giggling over that one!

Mandatory Morning Person

i think if one is to be employed as a crossing guard for school-aged children, one should smile and be nice, instead of glaring at them and every motorist around.

Just a thought.

Sunday, March 26, 2006

It's coming...!

i think Spring will really be here this year.  i've been awakened this morning to the sound of birds, not the sparrows which seem to be permanently outside of my window but morning doves and robins, i heard a cardinal -well two of them - calling back and forth...and i live in the city! 

Spring is such a strange and wonderful beast.  Summer is all glorious and hot and muggy. Autumn, my favorite time of year, is crisp and cool and sweet - fallen leaves have a crunch and aroma to them that are pure pleasure.  Winter brings cold and snow, ice too.  But then there is that time when it's not really winter and it's not really Spring and you think that life and the world are very dismal and gray.  And then...



Here comes Spring.  With all of it's vibrant colours and scents.  Baby birds and rabbits and other creatures (just please, no mice!)  And with the dawning and rebirth of the earth, the feelings of new life can reach deep into your heart and soul, breathing in freshness and giving you the feeling that you CAN and will survive....and do it well.

i have the feeling, that Spring is coming.



Friday, March 24, 2006

Odd things

On Sunday, as i  was cooking, i burnt my hand on the burner.  Right hand  - ring finger - on the back - bad hurt for quite some time but true to nature, i kept it under or close to cool water until the sting stopped and then let it alone so that nature could take it's course and heal.  All was going well until i recently reburnt it(don't ask) and now it is quite red and sore.

So i thought, in all my medical wisdom, that a little neosporin might help heal and would certainly relieve the discomfort (it's applied now - and yes, it feels better already!).

i went to the place where i keep all my first aid type things - and yes, i have a place for it - only to find that my neosporin wasn't there.  i rummaged through tubes of this and that until i found it - or so i thought.  In my haste to apply the ointment, i failed to see that the tube i had in my hand was....::blush::...vaginal itching cream.

One might wonder A) why on earth i have such cream (i dont know!) and 2) how such cream could possibly help a burn.

It doesn't.

Don't ask, just trust me on this.

Neosporin feels much, much better.


Thursday, March 23, 2006

Time to Travel

i'm a bolter.  Yup sure am - when stress or conflict get too high or too much to bear - i bolt.  Guess what?  i'm about to do it.  i have this incredibly strong urge to just walk away from everything.  my job, my family, my friends, my house - all...just bolt.  Go somewhere new. Start fresh. 

Problem is - i could very well be bolting from myself.  Hmm..well then, moving somewhere else wouldn't help much, would it?  lol

So, maybe i'd better just face my demons, my fears and shortcomings and make the most of right? Right.

On another note:
Car was stolen and found.
Fridge quit and was replaced.
Choir issue - OH MY WORD!  enough said
Job: If i don't find something else soon, i'm going to start drinking and driving
Relationships: don't ask
Cats:  FUNNY as heck
Me:  gonna make it.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Where have i been?

Good grief!  Where have i been?  This stress thing is a killer  - sheesh...i've neglected my poor lil blog.

i will post multiple words here tomorrow. 


Tuesday, March 7, 2006

God, don't leave me ....

These words, sung by MaryMary, have been going through my head.  Sometimes life looms ahead, dark and dreary, or something happens (stolen car) that tries to break my spirit (almost succeeded) but...

"Can't Give Up Now"

There will be mountains that I will have to climb
And there will be battles that I will have to fight
But victory or defeat, it's up to me to decide
But how can I expect to win If I never try.

I just can't give up now
I've come too far from where I started from
Nobody told me the road would be easy
and I don't believe he brought me this far to leave me

Never said there wouldn't be trials
Never said I would't fall
Never said that everything would go the way I want it to go
But when my back is against the wall
And i feel all hope is gone,
I'll just lift my head up to the sky
And say help me to be strong

I just can't give up now
I've come too far from where I started from
Nobody told me the road would be easy
and I don't believe he brought me this far to leave me

No you didn't bring me out here to leave me lonely
Even when I can't see clearly
I know that you are with me(so I can't)

I just can't give up now
I've come too far from where I started from
Nobody told me the road would be easy
and I don't believe he brought me this far to leave me

Monday, February 27, 2006 be a woman

i love being a woman. i love the luxury of a lavendar scented bubble bath. i love using products that make my face glow. i love rubbing lotion into smooth, warm moist skin that is my own. i highly enjoy wearing pretty little nighties (though i never sleep in them - only sleep nude). i love lighting candles and enjoying the strains of Samuel Barber's "Adagio for Strings" while lying in a bed piled with thick blankets atop cool, crisp sheets.

i truly love being a woman.

Out from under my nose...

As i was leaving my house to go to work, i realized that my car was gone.  i parked it yesterday, in front of my house...where i normally park it.  And now.  Gone.  hmm.  So, i called the police..they didn't tow it, it wasn't reposessed (all up to date with payments) so..uh, i guess it was stolen. Police have been here.  Neighbors all up in arms. Insurance company called.  And here i sit.   An unexpected day off?  grrrrrrrrrrrrr

Wednesday, February 22, 2006

A Girl in Paris

i used to live in Paris.  Seriously.  i had a studio flat in a small town on the outskirts of Paris.

Paris, France.

 On my days off, i would take the train to the heart of the city - 13 min ride - and spend the day roaming the streets of Paris.  Eating in cafes.  Walking along the Seine.  Going to the Louvre.  Riding the metro.  Finding the few (but wonderful) English bookstores and spending hours in them.  Sitting in Parks and enjoying the sun as i munched on cheese and a bannette.


When the children didn't have school, we would often go to the park for an entire day.  Packing a picnic lunch, taking books to read, playing and running around the bushes and the hill...

Stopping at the Patisserie and buying Pain de Chocolat for the children's (and my) goutet.

Paris.  i lived there.  i made friends with all sorts of folk.  i shopped in Continent and Auchan and our little grocery and also the market on Wed and Sat. 

i used to live in Paris.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

High Tea and Compliment

Last Saturday, my au pairs, their host moms and my own mother and i went to a  local tea room just to spend some time together and to enjoy a bit of elegance.  The place where we dined had all of the potential to be a very elegant place, however, because of either lack of care, or good taste, it was more shabby chic than elegant.

my sweet Mother gave me such a high compliment this morning ...she said she had been thinking about that tea room and thought that if i owned it, it would be a place of elegance, high class but yet not too 'stuffy'...(WOW..thank you Mom)

She also said, with a smile in her voice,  "...and you would not have served High Tea whilst wearing pants!  Humph!"


Tuesday, February 14, 2006

Girlie Girl

i grabbed my nail polish to bring to work with me because my finger nails needed one more coat and i had to leave - no time.  As i was speeding down the highway, i attempted to apply another coat, but that wasn't working so well. the fist 'pull off' i did.  Zip! Off the road, put another coat of pretty pink polish on my nails, and ZIP! right back on the road  -not long at all but i knew by the time i arrived at work, it would be dry and no one would be the wiser for my silly antics.

When i told the story to a co-worker, she said i was the girliest girl she knew.  Maybe so, but my nails look pretty dang good!

As a side note:

Happy Valentine's Day to all.

Saturday, February 11, 2006

Coming Out Party

Scene: Tupperware Party

Place:  My house

Guests: Fifteen women, giggling and fun.  We were asked the different types of party themes you can have with a Tupperware party.  "Book, Auction, Naughty Nighty..etc."

my sweet mother pipes up, "A coming out party!"

Dead silence followed by gales of laughter as she realizes what she's said.  She was thinking "Sweet 16 /Coming Out/Debut"....we were thinking "Coming Out of the Closet..."

She's very pretty when she blushes 20 shades of pink....whilst laughing heartily.


Friday, February 10, 2006

Beautiful Freedom

The voices from the next office - haltingly as the speaker's words are translated into English have lulled me into a nice sense of peace.  i'm was getting my work done and not paying attention at all, just enjoying the Russian being spoken and the thick accented one doing the translating.

Then..just ears perked up as the conversation changed to WWII and how that impacted Russian churches.  "All the men were thrown in prison...only the ladies remained..."  "We saw bodies floating down the river on a daily basis....shot by the police..."  "Churches could not the entire Soviet Union..."  and on and on.

i stopped what i was doing and just listened.  i've never experienced that.  If i want to go to church, i go.  If i don't, i don't.  If i want to try a different church every week, i do it.  If i never want to go, i don't.  Freedom.  i can choose.  i'm not thrown in prison if i go to a church.  i'm not harassed by the police or the government.  i have freedom.

i'm still listening to their conversation.  i am in awe and so thankful for this country.  i am thankful for those who gave (give) their lives so that i can make the choice.  i am in awe of this beautiful freedom.

Sunday, February 5, 2006

Sweet sixtenn

Sixteen yrs ago, today, a young black woman went into premature labor and gave birth to a 2lb, 9oz little baby girl.  Sixteen yrs ago, today, that baby was poked and prodded and given all sorts of medical treatment, was flown to a trauma hospital, was put in a special crib, was abandoned by that black woman - her mother.  

This morning, a 16 yr old, bi-racial, beautiful young woman, sang a solo in church.  She stood tall and strong, her lovely face lifted, her voice amazing and pure of tone.   That 16 yr old young woman is my adopted sister.  i was and am so proud of her.  i am thankful to God for allowing her to make it past 2lbs 9oz and also for bringing her to my parents and our family.  

To say my heart is full - is an understatement of epic proportions.

Saturday, February 4, 2006

A birthday thing-y

Stubborn and hardhearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves traveling. Dislike being at home. Restless. Not having many children.
Hardworking. High spirited. Spendthrift.'s my response:  Everything is correct except:  NOT hardhearted, have never had an ear ache, i can breathe very well - although did have trauma in that area as a young child (age 2), i LOVE being at home, and i am not a spendthrift...

Friday, February 3, 2006


Rain pelts my bedroom window
City streetswet and glistening
Giggling school girls under umbrellas
Windshield wipers rhythm
All lulling my soul to a sense of quiet and peace.

Beautiful rainy Friday.

Thursday, January 26, 2006


WOW.  i'm having one horrible hair day.  What in the world happened between yesterday and today that made it look like this?  ... hair that looks like it's from the dark side.  Sheesh...

(scissors anyone?)

Monday, January 23, 2006

i want... go to Africa. i want to go to Kenya.


Why is it that Monday mornings always find me exhausted?  i'm sitting at my desk at work and i want nothing more than to crawl underneath it, pull the chair in and curl up in a ball and sleep.  i even went to bed early!  Sheesh!  What's the deal???

Maybe it's just the drudgery of a new week at a job that is less than satisfying...
Maybe it's just the Monday morning blues....
Maybe it's because it's cold and rainy outside..
Maybe i need to find a sugar-daddy...
Maybe not.  LOL

Ugh. Monday....

Saturday, January 21, 2006

Let's talk about shoes...

i am currently wearing a nice comfortable pair of Nikes...just got back from a delicious power walk.  However, most of the time, i'm in high heels.  4" or higher.  And they are comfortable.  And they look good.  And they make me feel pretty and sexy.  i love wearing heels.

i ran into a friend yesterday who had on a pair of VERY cute shoes - but only about 1" heel and she was complaining that her feet were killing her.  Huh?  One inch heels and they hurt?  Well i guess everyone has their limit, right? 

And it got me thinking about shoes..and women..and shoes...and how sometimes what we like, we think everyone should like.  i personally think most/all women should wear more skirts and dresses and heels.  i mean we have curves for a reason.  Shouldn't hide them behind big ole' baggy jeans or sweat shirts...let your clothes and shoes work for you. 

But for certain, wear those heels, baby!

Monday, January 16, 2006

Superbowl? Blech

So the long awaited Superbowl is just about upon us.  i'm not even excited this year for two reasons. 

1.  Eagles miserable year (enough said)

2.  The Monday after the Superbowl last year my house was robbed. 

The second reason is giving me anxiety and's not pleasant. The police never found who did it, though some of my neighbors thought it may have been another neighbor, who has since moved away.  But still.

Last night i had yet another dream of my house being broken into, but in this one, i ended up shooting the guy (UGH) six times... R leg (twice), R shoulder, r arm, foot and R hand.  i remember clearly 'aiming' for the right side so that i wouldn't hit his heart.  How gruesome!  ugh.  i hate dreams like that. 

But it does show a sense of unrest in my mind and i'm not sure what to do to combat it.  Also, last year after it happened, a good friend called me every night and talked to me until i fell asleep.  He did that for about two months.  What a true friend.

So maybe i should get excited about the Superbowl and then just stay home the Monday after...or get a guard dog for a day...or just be brave and keep living and keep a positive attitude!

Wish me luck!

Saturday, January 14, 2006

Shoe Fetish

i had a very busy day today - up early and out doing errands and such.  One of my stops was at the laundry mat, where i had to do some bulky items, you know the kind that doesn't fit in the normal washer.  Because it was raining, i wore my lovely black knee-high 4" heeled boots. my skirt went to just above my knees, so there was a bit of stocking clad leg visible. 

As i was in the laundry mat, a little boy, about 2 yrs of age, kept coming over to me and staring at my boots, then he would reach out and touch my knee and then run away.  He was adorable!  Everytime he ran away, he giggled.  And i was thinking, 'uh oh...he's starting early!"  He must have done that five times before he and his mom/dad and baby sister left. 

Well, whether he ends up having a shoe fetish or not, i certainly hope he never loses his sense of wonder and i also hope that when he is grown, some woman will wear such shoes for him.

Thursday, January 12, 2006

That's easy for YOU to say....

Last night, on the way home from choir practice, my two younger sisters and i were trying out a new (or new to us) tongue twister.  Gales of laughter could've been heard from my car, if someone had been around to bother and listen.  As i dropped them off at my parent's house - they were still trying to get it right.  Between the three of us, we could get it right one time..but forget it for the other two times. try it.  Three times.  Fast.  Go on. 

Camel Coloured Caramel

Yeah, that's what i thought.   LOL  Don't worry, we're laughing WITH you!


Monday, January 9, 2006

Confession is good for the soul?

Ok, confession time.  i have an addiction.  i am a blog-aholic.  A voyeur into people's lives, perhaps. Is there a cure?  Do i want a cure?  No, not really. i find other people's lives totally fascinating.  The written word has always held great power over me and in blogs i find myself totally immersed.  i do draw the line, however, when it comes to thinking about or worrying about the writers of the blogs.  That's just too far.  If i ever get to that point, i think i'll join a support group.  Until then, however, i'll read on...

Oh wait, my favourite husband/wife bloggers just posted a new one...gotta go!

Thursday, January 5, 2006

Cats vs. Dogs

Cats are the ultimate narcissists. You can tell this because of all the time they spend on personal grooming. Dogs aren't like this. A dog's idea of personal grooming is to roll in a dead fish.      ~James Gorman

Wednesday, January 4, 2006

Baby, it's cold inside

We were advised yesterday, before leaving work for the day, that the building would be unheated.  Seems that the HVAC system is broken (again!) and they have to shut it off until it's repaired.  Last time this happened (right before Christmas) the temperature never got above 65F.

So this morning i'm dressed for it.  Longer skirt, tights, my 4" knee high boots, a tank top and sweater (wonder what Stacy and Clinton would say about this outfit!).  i'm ready for the cold office.

...or Siberia...

Monday, January 2, 2006


Dang it!  i have it again!  It descends on me like a plague, making me long for a new place, new people, new surroundings.  Wanderlust. Part of the Irish history - always searching for 'home' and never finding it....the need for travel...the need to go to Ireland to find those roots.  The pull is strong, always has been.  Usually a good road trip will dissipate the need, but lately, it consumes me. 

A trip is planned for May - the month of May - the entire month of May...i hope i can last that long...maybe i should buy my ticket today!  

...i was born under a wanderin' star...a wanderin', wanderin' star.....

Sunday, January 1, 2006

A New Year

So this is 2006.  i wonder what this year will hold for me.  i wonder where i'll be at the end of it.  i wonder if it will be a good year or one i'd rather forget. i wonder.  The past year was a good one...there were bumps...there were problems...there were certainly national and international things that were dreadful...there were good times...there were plenty of good times....many times to laugh...many times to smile...many times to love.

So i hope for good things, new things, exciting things for this new year. i set three goals for myself this year..only three.  Two are long-term goals and one is a short-term goal.  i'm excited to get started on them.

But first, more coffee....and a bubble bath!