I want to wish everyone a very Happy New Year. May your year be blessed and wonderful, may you have the strength and wisdom to get through the hard times, may you have the joy and laughter to get sail through the good times.
Live life to the fullest. Laugh whenever you can. Love those around you.
And go have another cup of coffee....it's a holiday!
So here we are, the week between the Christmas and New Year. Yesterday was an odd day, but able to watch Scrooge with my siblings and parents....all of us curled up on couches or the floor, most still in their pj's (and it was 3pm), fire in the fire place, dog chewing her Christmas bone, cats stretched out under my brother's wheel chair. Watching Scrooge (with Albert Finney) is a family tradition.
i love such traditions. They give one the feeling that all is well and everything is going according to plan. Maybe that's my need for order and love of 'lists'...maybe it's just the time spent wtih family doing something we all like. Whatever it is, this week is another one that makes My Favourites list.
...warm, rich scents fill the house - cookies and lemon cake cooling on their racks, wood gleaming and lemon oiled, windows sparkling with the electric candles shining through for all to see, and even the toilet is clean. she is ready for her guests who are due to arrive tomorrow afternoon, presents all wrapped and the tree trimmed in gold and ivory.
she is almost completely content....not quite - but that can't be helped, so she will welcome her guests with open arms, stuff them full of good food and sweets and celebrate this very wonderful holiday.
...love that show - and heard today:
"Elegance is the art of doing simplicity well."
i think there are mice residing in the wall of my sitting room. i don't mind mice- when they are outdoors and running wildly through a meadow, or darting under a mushroom to take cover from the rain. i don't mind mice when they are the cutest characters in a children's story. i don't mind mice when they are in someone else's house. i DO, in fact, mind mice when they are in my house. i've never had a mouse problem before and certainly don't want to start now.
Maybe i should just tell them how i feel and then maybe they will just pack up their little family and move on down the street.
Where's the pied piper when you need him? :::sigh::::
Oh the weather outside is frightful but the fire is so delightful
And as long as you love me so, let is snow, let it snow, let it snow
(your love plus a snow day tomorrow - both are equally important. <grin>)
Here's hoping for a good snow fall - i have a ton of things to do in this house before the big party on Saturday!
6:44am Edit:
it is indeed a snow day - snow falling at a great rate = fast and furious. i'm so excited - a full three-day weekend. AND i can get everything done this morning that needs to be done for the party. Lovely! But for now, i'm going back to bed and enjoy another hour or so of sleep.
Sunday's performance went much better. Everyone seemed more relaxed and then were able to enjoy themselves as well as do a good job. Even the orchestra did a better job. It was great fun and frankly, i'lll miss the vocal work-out that i got every week. Such an undertaking provides a sharpening of skills once learned and reminds me of my love of music, that it is in my blood and that it must always be a part of my life.
i loved watching the face of our director. He is very animated, in a good way...offering encouraging smiles when all goes well, or an understanding look if someone didn't do quite as they ought. And when he was moved by the power of it all, his face showed it - which made us sing even better.
T'was a good weekend. A very good weekend.
Well...it didn't go off without a hitch but at least no catastrophy. Personally, i made four mistakes, two of them being when i was so enthralled by the sopranos power on some of the high notes that i forgot to sing, once i wasn't counting properly and once i sang the wrong word. Not good.
Another chance to redeem those mistakes tomorrow and hopefully all will go well.
The orchesta wasn't bad - for a community orchestra, although there was one violinist who was consistely off by a bit - just enough to make my spine react.(not in a good way)
And once, Dr. Sidebothom had us stand for no reason - his face showing horror as he realised his mistake...was somewhat priceless.
All in all - not a bad night. We'll see how tomorrow goes.
Handel's Messiah is set for tonight @ 7.30pm and Sunday @ 2.30pm (EST)...i'd rather not break a leg - but if that what it takes....:::grin:::
Going to be a busy but good weekend, i think.
i
have had the privilege of singing in a community choir which is
associated with my workplace. This is in addition to all my
other things that seemed crammed into my life. However, we are
performing
the Messiah this weekend and tonight is the dress rehearsal.
There are loosely 120 voices and we've been practicing for the
past two months to ready ourselves for this occasion. What a joy
to lift
one's voice up and sing with others who share the same passion for
music as
i. And our conductor is a hoot! He's a rather interesting
man -
funny, intelligent, eclectic, talented - everything a conductor should
be. i've not sung in such a choir for a while and it's been great
fun and
good discipline to get back into it. So tonight is the end of
practice and i must be honest in saying that i'll miss the fun and work.
Don't know what i'll do with my Tuesday nights now though - maybe take up
basket weaving? Knitting? Sheep shearing? hmm....or maybe i'll just
perfect the art of the three hour bubble bath!
AND something i forgot...i was invited to attend the Christmas dance at
the studio where i take lessons. It's by invitation only, from
what i understand and i'm honored to have been asked. However,
i'm in a bit of a panic as i've only ever danced with my instructor and
what if i'm asked to dance and the man knows some other step and i end
up in a heap on the floor? OR worse yet, what if no one asks
...AND i have nothing to wear to this thing...AND i'm excited yet
petrified and i should've said that i was unable to attend AND i'm not
ready = i've only had four lessons and can only do basic steps and for
goodness sake why did i say 'yes'? HELP!
i come from a large family. There are eight children. It's a nice, noisy, loving, laughing family. But our ages range from me (who shall ever remain 29) to a six yr old. Fun.
my 16 yr old sister has a boyfriend. A nice guy, thus far. Tall - 6'3" (yum!), cute kid. Poor thing has almost met the entire family and gets drilled from all angles. What you guys go through sometimes....<grin>
And it made me think of when i was 16...my boyfriend was 18 and we had a great relationship. Lived in the sticks but had fun nonetheless. One of my dates with him was to go with his brother and girlfriend and the four of us went up into the mountains to shoot 'pop' cans. Yes, shoot. With guns. Rifles. A hand gun. Yes, me. All dressed up (not in a skirt though) and shooting guns....And we were very careful and not stupid, just practicing. (by the way, i'm not a bad shot) For our date. ROFL...oh man, what a time! What a life!
Happy Thanksgiving (if you're in the U.S.)
Happy Thursday (if you're not!)
For me, this is my favourite of all holidays. i am blessed to have an amazing and fun family. AND there was enough asparagus for all....
So which is more embarrassing::
1. Choking up while talking with the oil dispatcher because they can't make a delivery until Monday and i have guests coming tomorrow and my oil tank is quite low.
-or-
2. Crying outright when the accounts manager called back and says they will be there first thing on Friday and that she was calling me because the oil dispatcher was very concerned about me.
(ok, so i'm a emotional female - but it was so kind of them to get the oil to me early...and yes, i do normally check the tank more frequently, but i had other things going on for the past three weeks...)
Edit: when i got home just a bit ago - there was evidence that the oil guy had been there - and they filled my tank. Kindess and good customer service can sometimes make someone's day. Excuse me while i go cry one more time.
...find the recording of Gabriel Faure's Pavane, Opus 50, with the BBC Philharmonic.
It is breath-takingly gorgeous.
i first heard it performed in a Parisian metro..and wept (i was weepy anyway because i was about to come home in three days' time) for the beauty of it. Music for the soul.
Soooo....hmm...the Eagles...well what can i say? To lose to the Giants??? The arch-rivals? Eagles fans are typically taught from early on that the Giants and Cowboys are fierce foes, and while individual players may be admired from afar - never, ever root for them and in fact, a deep dislike is preferred. ::sigh:: And Trotter's injury - not good. But there were some awesome blocks from the offensive line and Westbrook was all over the place and who can say enough about Lewis' one-handed catch or the defense and dang but McMahon can throw bullets and run and leap and take hits and jump right back up (wonder how he's feeling today...<yikes>) - ....so grrrrrrrrrrrrrrr to this loss.
What is it about football that i enjoy so much? i've wondered that often. Maybe because i've been watching since five months old? Maybe the sheer competition? Maybe the exciting plays and tension? i'm not a statistics junky, i can't tell you the numbers that each player wears, sometimes i don't even know the names of the new guys for months, that is all unimportant...but i do know great block, i can pick out holding and clipping, i get crazy excited with a break-away run or a "Hail Mary" pass...when B.Dawkins comes out of nowhere and bats down balls or makes a block that rattles teeth, or Kearse, or Trotter...i can holler with the best of them..my stomach tenses when Westbrook is plowing through a pile o'guys and when McNabb or McMahon are scrambling i'm usually saying "look out, look out"...LOL..crazy. Who knows.
ps: it's nice that the Eagles have two QBs with Irish last names...
The candles were glowing, china sparking and the silver just right. Beautiful. Delicious smells from the kitchen and soft music said that this was not going to be just an ordinary supper - the table was set for more than the normal one - and there was a feeling of expectancy in the air. she moved from room to room double checking everything - from the placement of the candles to the level of warmth. Everything was in place and she was ready to receive her guests.
They were going to celebrate Thanksgiving - yes, a few weeks early but it didn't matter for these guests had never celebrated such a feast and it was her honor to help them learn a tradition that was very dear to her heart. her guests came from all over the world: Australia, Austria, Germany, Mexico, Columbia and Equador. Six beautiful women, one from each country, were living in the States for at least one year and were part of an Au Pair Exchange program.
The first to arrive was the German, with her slight Berlin accent to her perfect English noticeable as she apologized for being late(she was right on time). Then came the Australian and Austrian. And lastly the three Latinas - shorter, darker - full of passion. They all brought a dish from their own country - some of them spent hours making tortillas and salads and strudel. They laughed and got all the food on the table, including the turkey and stuffing that she had made for them. They tried all the dishes (even a bit of Veggie Might) and declared everything delicious.
And as she looked around the table, candlelight glowing off of each face, she felt a twinge of something not quite known. These girls, some of them only 19 yrs old, so far from home, so full of hope. Lives left at 'home', loves, pets, siblings, parents...and yet in this small space of time, they were a little family of women, sharing a meal, learning a very American tradition. she felt so fortunate, so very fortunate to be part of their lives.
her Thanksgiving memories are so strong and wonderful. So many relatives gather around similar tables, children laughing, everyone eating and declaring 'not another bite' as they reach for just one more slice of that cranberry bread. Laughter has always been in her life as well as love, family, hopes and dreams and are they not all summed up in Thanksgiving? Is Thanksgiving not a time where one can take a few minutes to reflect on all that has transpired throughout the year and give thanks?
And she is thankful. Thankful to be alive. Thankful to have a house and a job. Thankful for friends and family who love and care for her.
she will attend the tradtional Thanksgiving meal in a few weeks, but she doesn't think it can top the one she had tonight.
Ok, here's a rant: T.O -Philadelphia Wide Receiver....
What the heck is the deal with this guy? He is so very talented and a hard worker and yet, he had the maturity of a gnat. i have only one claim to fame...i've served hamburgers and other lovely Burger King fast food to Hugh Douglass - when Hugh played for Central State and saw first hand that Hugh is a big man. He was a big man in college. T.O is a complete idiot to start something ...to make threats..to insult. Throw him out on his ear...and H.D should've done it.
i'm in complete disgust with most of the team and certainly the ones who make the decisions to cut guys, etc. Last year they had such a tight team - leadership was prevelant, good players who had the 'fire' to win, strong men (shiver) and yet this year, they play no better than the local high school team? What the heck is up with that?
i was impressed with T.O when he first joined the team - he did work hard, he made plays happen, he did a good job...not to mention that he has one buff...oh, nevermind....
So give him the boot. He'd better leave Philly in a hurry - Eagles fans aren't exactly known for being genteel and forgiving! (i think Wamp calls us 'thugs') And for pity's sake, don't pick fights with a man who used to bench press Burger King workers after practices...sheesh.
(ps. there are also those who shine on the team...my favorite being B.Dawkins...what a guy.....)
http://www.philadelphiaeagles.com
Edit: and i just saw that Ackers (kicker) has been given an extension...SWEET...
Edit 2: i'm just a chatty Cathy today....
Sooooo yesterday i
wore dress pants to work....first time...ever...and cause a small riot
on campus as well as in my neighborhood. Nothing superb about
them- just nice black dress pants - wore the cutest lil boots...
When i got home - was talking to my neighbor and in mid-sentence he
yells, "OH MY WORD! YOU"RE WEARING PANTS!" Guess then
everyone heard him and had to comment/look/point/stare....think i'll
stick to skirts/dresses! LOL Sheesh!
Today, i learned of the death of one of my choir members (i direct a choir..). Gloria was given three months to live about four years ago. Watching her endure hardships of cancer and the radiation burns, losing her hair and all that goes with it, was difficult - espeically since she is only a few years older than my own mother. However, she refused to feel sorry for herself, nor give in to the cancer. She fought a long hard road and left this world, headed for the loving arms of God...
If i could say one last thing to her it would be: Your cheerful and willing spirit to sing even when you weren't feeling well was well noticed. You have taught me how to face terrible things with grace and hope. i have watched your life closely, especially these past four years and am glad to have known you - you taught me much. i will miss you, dear friend. You lived a good life, you fought a terrible disease well...thank you for all the kind things you said to me - all the encouragement. How you publicly thanked me for being the choir director when i was feeling like i was in over my head (smile). You pushed me to use my talents - "bugging" me for months to apply for the posistion and then sang with enthusiasm..saying how the music lifted your soul - and spirits when you were down. Thank you, Gloria, for being a wonderful, beautiful woman....your children will rise up and call you blessed....and i softly say 'amen'...Goodbye dear Gloria.
So...here's a good thing - other than a breathtakingly gorgeous day - i am going to spend a few days with a friend during this week. She and i have all sorts of antics cooked up and i cannot wait. i typically get restless during this time of year anyway - feel the need to move, travel, that sort of thing, so this quick trip is just the thing to get me through...until the next urging of wanderlust and then i'll be setting my sights on Ireland...
Another grey day here in Pennsylvania. i don't think i remember October being like this - i remember warm days and cold nights and the leaves changing. But this year, wow, feels like March. Odd, very odd.
i always wanted to get married in October! LOL i don't know why. It is my favorite time of the year for sure.
i think i'm going to make homemade soup and croissants today. i need to eat.
i also think i'm going to the gym today.
There once was a sweet Irish lass,
Her figure a fine hourglass.
Mens' hearts are aflame,
As they loudly exclaim,
"Man, get a look at that ass!"
LOL Trip - thank you g/f!!! and WOOO HOOOOOO.....
i have some amazing, wonderful, caring friends both online and offline. But there are some of 'you' online friends who blow me away with your kindness and concern and i want to thank you.
Sometimes you never know the impact of kind words.
Thank you.
The other night i had the pleasure of attending a high school band competition. At the intermission, all of the local highschool's senior band members were honored and pictures taken with their parents. One girl's set of parents really stuck out in my mind.
This girl had a mom, dad and step mom. All three adults seemed to get along rather well as they chatted in line waiting for their daughter's name to be announced. As they walked out onto the field to greet their daughter, i noticed what they were wearing. Mom was wearing a cute black skirt and cream top, the best knee high boots and an adorable red coat. Her hair and makeup were fabulous. She wasn't a size 3 but she looked amazing. Dad wore a pair of nice dress pants, shirt, tie and a jacket - he was well put together. Step -mom...welll...she wore a pair of too baggy dress pants, flat shoes and a ill fitting jacket. i turned to another woman and said, "Mom WAY outdressed Step-Mom, didn't she?" and we giggled a bit about that but it made me think. Made me wonder what the story was between the three. They appeared like a Princess Diana, Prince Charles and Camilla type situation. Made you wonder what Dad saw in the woman he was currently married to. Not because she was an awful woman - it was apparent that the daughter loved all three and interacted with all three - but she didn't dress to impress.
So common girls, work it! Dress to impress, not only your SO but also to let others know - for there are ALWAYS others watching you - that you embrace good style, you embrace your soft feminine side, you embrace the amazing creature that is called woman. No matter your shape or size, a well put together outfit, crease free fabrics, makeup and hair that are cared for say alot more than you can imagine.
i'm sure Step-Mom is a wonderful lady. i'm sure she's been a great second mother that that girl and that her husband loves her, but i wonder if she would've 'kicked it up a notch' what people in the stands would've said. Probably something like "oohhh that man knows how to pick women!" or wondered why Dad ever married Mom in the first place!
So c'mon girls...be the fabulously dressed 'Mom' ....wear those skirts (watch how you sit in them - no creases in the back, please), don those high heeled boots, and spend a few minutes more on your face and hair and turn those heads. Both Men and women will take notice...and i'll be applauding you all the way.
Work it!
1. WHAT COLOR PANTS ARE YOU WEARING? Don't wear pants, i prefer skirts.
2. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? The women in the hallway
laughing like a screech owl!
3. SOUPS OR SALAD? Either...depends on my mood
4. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? Small piece of cake
5. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Either dark green or dark red - depending on my mood.
6. WEATHER RIGHT NOW? Gorgeous, warm, sunny nice breeze
7. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My neighbor.
8. HOW ARE YOU TODAY? Doing great...Happy!
9. FAVORITE DRINK? Homemade iced tea, lots of ice and lemon
10. FAVORITE SPORTS: American Football , Ice Skating
11. HAIR COLOR? Brunette with alot of red highlights
13. EYE COLOR? Brown eyed girl
14. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Yes
15. SIBLINGS AND THEIR AGES? Ahh - too many to mention - Ages: 32, 25, 19, 16, 15, 13, 6
16. TATTOOS OR PIERCINGS? One hole each ear
17. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? WOW, i can't even remember.
18. FAVORITE DAY OF THE YEAR? Thanksgiving
19. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT? i'm not too shy but preferred to be the askee instead of the asker.
20. SUMMER OR WINTER? Neither, Autumn is my favorite.
21. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE-NIGHT STANDS? Umm.....oh, wait - relationships, of course..yes, of course.
22. CHOCOLATE OR VANILLA? Dark chocolate
24. WHAT BOOKS ARE YOU READING? "One hundred year of solitude"
by Gabriel Garcia Marquez and "Tailing Mulligan: Mastering the Art of
Workplace Communication" by Dr. Robert Skacel, Jr.
25 WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Company logo
26. FAVORITE BOARD GAME. Parcheesi
27. WHAT DID YOU DO LAST NIGHT? Did Pilates, read, facial, chatted online, manicure
28. FAVORITE SMELLS? So many - A good smelling Man, Mom's bread, Vanilla-Lavendar bath salts, Clean laundry...
29. CAN YOU TOUCH YOUR NOSE WITH YOUR TONGUE? No
30. WHAT INSPIRES YOU? That depends on the situation
31. BUTTERED, PLAIN, OR SALTED POPCORN? Salted
32. FAVORITE FLOWER? Roses of any color and peonies
33. HOW MANY KEYS ON YOUR KEY RING? 12
34. CAN YOU JUGGLE? No way Jose...
35. WHAT WOULD YOU HATE TO BE TRAPPED IN A ROOM WITH? Mice or crawling things
36. COFFEE? OR TEA? Coffee in the morning; tea in evening.
37. FAVORITE PERFUME? i haven't found one i absolutely can't live without but i do enjoy B&BW - Night Blooming Jasmine
38. DOGS or CATS? both
39. FAVORITE PLACE TO VISIT? Switzerland - Jura Mountains or Paris
40. FAVORITE DAY OF THE WEEK? Thursday
Artist: Josh Gracin
Song: Stay With Me (Brass Bed)
Lyrics :
Baby, the clock on the wall is lying
It's not really that late
It's too cold outside to bewalking around the streets of this town
Anywhere if you think you have to be can wait
Why don't you stay with me
Share all your secrets tonight
We can make believe the morning sun never will rise
Come and lay your head on this big brass bed
And we'll be alright as long as you stay with me, yeah
Baby, there is just no use in hiding
The way that I am feeling right now
With you standing there baby I swear I can't help but stare
Girl you're wearing me out, wearing me out
Baby, stay with me share all your secrets tonight
We can make believe the morning sun never will rise
Come and lay your head on this big brass bed
We'll be alright as long as you stay with me
Baby don't go it looks like it's starting to rain
And it's so warm here in this apartment wrapped up in this blanket
So stay
Stay with me
Share all your secrets tonight
We can make believe the morning sun never will rise
Come and lay your head on this big brass bed
And we'll be alright as long as you stay
I'll be alright as long as you stay with me, yeah
Stay with me
Something that should have been lovely and wonderful just went completely and utterly wrong.
Lately, i've been giving a lot of time thinking about the lost 'art' of elegance. In our soceity, it seems as though we've gone very casual and that reflects on every aspect of our lives.
However, in light of the absolute horror of what has happened in Louisana and Mississippi, this topic can wait until next week.
Don't you just love songs that you can sing at the top of your lungs. Pure joy. Unadulterated bliss. Throw your head back, crank up the volume and become 'one' with the music. Today was one of those days. When i heard that ole' song (Natural Woman) i sang it with abandon...cause...
Today was a day where i was totally thrilled to be a woman - basking in my femininity, embracing my softness, flouncing around in my skirt and heels and realizing that the "you" that makes me feel like a natural woman...is the permission i give myself to be one. Not to fight to be manly or pushing my way through life, but loving the softer side of me. The side that loves nail polish and stockings, make-up and jewerly, soft hair and giggles, high heels and scented lotion, elegant gestures and lipstick.
i'm a natural woman alright....and loving every minute of it.
Home. What a delicious word. i love going away. Especially to Europe - it fuels me towards higher fashion - toward a more graceful way of living. But i love coming home.
So today is the day to jet-set accross the ocean and see what lies on the other side. And if i'm not mistaken, that would be Europe <grin>.
I have a problem with planes. Not afraid, not even a little bit. My problem is that i turn into this little girl who is going someplace nice and is so excited that she wants to kick the back of the seat and ask every 10 min if we're there yet.... I would think, after all this time and being somewhat more mature than a 6 yr old, that i could sink into my plane seat, read for a few hours and then slip into dreamland, waking refreshed and dewey faced for the adventures of whatever country the plane lands.
But no, sadly, quite the opposite, save for the reading bit. i want to look out of the window to see where we are. However, since it is the middle of the night flying over the ocean and Greenland - there's nothing to see(although i must get to Greenland someday). So i look out into space -hoping to see something of interest, but alas that doesn't happen and then there is no leg room and i can't sleep and are we there yet and if that child doesn't stop crying i'm going to scream and ... and... and... ::sigh:::
So this trip, i've decided to do something different. i've messed up my body clock by staying up till odd hours and not sleeping much. Maybe this way, i'll be able to slip into dreamland and arrive looking refreshed instead of my normal zombie look. Maybe. Nice thing about jet lag is that is only lasts for a day or two, so by Monday, i'll be myself again.
But if you're in Hungary this weekend and you see a zombie-like woman, trying her best to look like a super model while really looking quite the opposite, feel free to say 'hello.'
Today's blasts in London remind me too well of that gorgeous-turned-horrid September day in NYC.
Take time to pray for those injured and for the families and loved ones of those who have died.
i love the ocean. i love the roar of the waves. i even love the annoying sand that gets everywhere. i love it because with the crashing of the waves upon the beach, the hot sun on my skin and friends and relatives around me, i am reminded all is well. The rhythm of life is felt in those waves, the future of our country is in the small children who dip their toes into the cold water and run screaming from the waves, or the small ones who stand, brave and terrified at the same time, sick ones feel better with the healing sea breeze, skin becomes tanned, hearts heal, problems are solved and love is rekindled. All at the shore. Come on in, the water's fine.
The weekend is finally here. i'm glad because it's been a rough week. More surgery for my brother, accusations from a co-worker that were totally unfounded, misunderstandings, financial setback, car problems, disappointments, hurts, boredom, too hot, a grandfather who is insisting upon surgery even though a doctor told him that he may not survive because of heart problems and broken promises -lend for a miserable outlook. i woke up this morning with the same tension in my shoulders that i went to bed with - but worse. This trip to Hungary is coming at the absolute worst time. And i am feeling sorry for myself. (can you tell? <wry grin>)
BUT - it is a gorgeous day today. The humidity finally is lower. There is a breeze. The sun is shining. i woke up. i'm healthy. my house is still standing. my car wasn't stolen. my coffee tasted wonderful this morning. i get to spend time in the garden - weeding and watering my flowers. i'm not having surgery. my brother is getting better. i am going to hungary. i have a wonderful family and good neighbors. i am employed.
i have to decide today that even though i feel that life has kicked me in the face this week and i feel defeated, unwanted, miserable, sad and lonely, that my attitude is a choice. i can determine the outcome of my day solely based upon my attitude. i would rather sit around today and cry and pout and throw a temper tantram - that would feel great, but that really isn't who i want to be. i'd rather meet such things - as this awful week - with quiet grace and determination to do better next week. Not denying my emotions and i probably do need a good cry, but realizing that one week isn't the end of it all. Today is a brand new day - no mistakes, no hurts, no misunderstandings, no pain. Might not be that way all day, but for now, in the quietness of my heart and house, i will embrace the day, thank God for my life and all that i have - including wonderful loved ones, friends and family, and go weed my garden.
Come with me - let's have a day of quiet grace.
Have you ever had an expectation of something good to come to you and then it doesn't happen? Or that you were supposed to meet up with a friend or loved one and they call at the last minute to cancel - or worse, never show up at all? Sometimes i think that handling disappointment graciously is a very difficult thing ..... but i'm trying.
Lost myself in a book this evening. One of my few pleasures. One that i enjoy more than most other 'down-time' things. When i was a child, my mother read to my sister and me every night before bed. Usually it was a chapter book and she'd allow a few chapters a night until we were finished - sometimes leaving us hanging on to some wonderful adventure that had to be continued the next night. We would protest and groan and beg for more - and sometimes she would give in - but more than not, we had to wait. i remember the words coming alive to me in pictures - like a movie - that would float through my head and allow me to get lost in the story.
i was told by my aunt, not long ago, that no one taught me to read. She said, and my Mother confirmed, that i was read to so often that i sorta memorized the words to a particular story and then learned to recognize the words....or something like that. This revelation came to me when i mentioned that i never remember anyone teaching me how to sound out words until i was an early teen and took a phonics course. Never taught to read??? Although, the joyous end for me is that i can read, and do it often, i can't imagine not being able to read - to 'get away' for a while in a good story or learn some incredible facts.
i'm sure you've seen the signs that say "if you can read this thank a teacher"...but in my case i guess i'd have to say "since i can read, i have to thank my Mother, who took the time to read aloud to me over and over again."
Thank You Mom.
When i lived in France, i had the privilege of meeting Grandma and Grandpa, LeeAnne’s parents. They moved to France when they were newly married and lived there as missionaries for many years. It’s so wonderful to be with Americans who have knowledge and understanding of a culture and language so well that they are honored amoung the local people as Grandma and Grandpa were – not to mention an absolutely flawless Parisian accent.
One time when they were visiting us, Grandpa went out to pick up some baguettes, cheese, wine and olives that would compliment the meal i was preparing for us all. When he returned, he rang the bell and Grandma answered it with the customary, “Oui?”. His reply to her was lost in the din of our conversation but i will never forget what she replied back to him. “C’est toi!!!” (It’s you!!) She said that with such delight and gladness that he had returned safely (he was only gone a short time and a few blocks away) that i’ve never forgotten it. “C’est toi” said “i’ve missed you, i’m glad you’re here, i love the sound of your voice, i’ve been waiting eagerly for you to return, i love you.” Very simple words, yet so profound.
And i wonder….if they can go through decades of marriage, learning a new language and culture, raising children,lifelong sickness and pain, misunderstandings from folks back in the States, and all the junk that life sometimes throws at us, and still, after all of that be delighted to be in each other’s presence, why is our generation so inept at staying married? True, Grandma and Grandpa have a deep faith in God and true, they did (and still do) take their marriage vows very seriously – but maybe it’s also a choice. A determination to enjoy each other, to welcome each other home like they were gone for days, to have respect and love for each other. i am honored to have known them and glad for the life long lesson taught to me by two simple words:
“C’est toi!!!!”
Next week i'll be embarking on a trip to Hungary. It's a business trip of sorts - paid for by my place of employment - but also a good will trip as i'm helping to co-lead a group of college students. Our goal is to teach them some volleyball skills at a camp. i love to travel. i've not been to Europe in two yrs and have the 'itch' to do so.
When i was young, my Father had a record (remember those?) of the sound track of "Paint Your Wagon" and on that record was a song "I was born under a wanderin' star." My Father would sing that to me and tell me that the Irish side of our family (His side) had that wanderlust problem. i think back then, i realized the urge to travel, to see new things, to meet new people....always wanting and loving home, but always in search of somewhere new and exciting. Part of that could be the Irish in me - i've heard it said that American Irish aren't content and don't lose the wanderlust until they go back to Ireland - and part of it could be that i grew up in a little town, on the side of a mountain, close to the river. Great place to raise children and room enough to allow developing minds to dream of what was over the next mountain. (by the way, in our case, it was another mountain!)
So, i'm excited to be going overseas for two weeks. The Hungarian people are wonderful, friendly and hospitable. You can hear wonderful gypsy music in the subways. You can still see the marks of years of communism but also the granduer of Budapest - imagining what it once was long ago.
Look up at the sky tonight...do you see that wandering star? i think it has my name on it...maybe yours too.
It rained today. Light, warm summer rain. The kind that makes you want to forget that you are an adult and inspires - calls you even - to take off your shoes and jump in the puddles.
