i want do the right thing. It doesn't have to be the popular thing or even the easy thing, but the right thing.
Back in early December i wrote that i had helped a family member escape an abusive situation. Now that family member, my sister, is coming back to the area against all family counsel (and her lawyer's as well). If she were acting alone and with only herself in mind, i would be prone to 'live and let live' and let her find out, even through the hard knocks of life, the path that she is to take and how God wants her to live. However, there is a five month old child involved in all of this and as anyone knows, that changes everything.
So i've said she can live with me for now. And i'm struggling to not feel depressed that it's all going to end badly and i'm inviting more turmoil into my home and life vs. wanting to be her cheerleader, helping when and where i can and backing off when i should. i WANT this to end well. i WANT her to grow and mature and be a wonderful mother and provide a stable envirornment for that baby (who, of course, is the cutest happiest baby in the world). i WANT her to follow God's path for her life and not just live for herself. i WANT her to succeed and get through these turbulant years.
But i'm not sure it's gonna happen.
So....i am going to do what i truly feel is the right thing to do for now. And then we'll just have to wait and see how things play out. i'm not a victim and never will play that part so if things DO get out of hand, i will be tougher than a Marine drill sgt. (oh yes i will...make no mistake about that!) and said sister will know that up front.
i'm still sick and still not sleeping before 3am - awake, tense, listening for any would-be intruders. Blech -i'm so done with that in the day time, but when i get into bed, everything changes. So stil working through alllll of that junk.
A lot on my plate right now.
Hope i can do it well.